And so cursed that he was, destined since birth to bear the heavy chains of a stygian existance, that in the very incipience of adulthood, lil' Timmy would find his driver's license suspended for six months when during a routine highway safety check, a police officer was to discover that he had been driving a motor(city, maybe (?!)) vehicle with open pornography.
Poor 'lol Timmy, having lost his birthright, left the country to regain the power he required to defeat the the dark overlords controlled by the evil pornography circle.