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  1. Ace Boobtoucher

    The Velocirapture is coming.

    Everyone look busy.
  2. Ace Boobtoucher

    Ever mistaken FB for Google?

    This guy did and kept going and going and going kept going and going and going kept going and going and going kept going and going and going kept going and going and going kept going and going and going. Old people are funny.
  3. Ace Boobtoucher

    The BaconSalt/LoveCock memorial...

    So who would let their **** frolic in its water?
  4. Ace Boobtoucher

    I'd fart on her, too.

    WDxK48wEO9Q I like the disclaimer at the end.
  5. Ace Boobtoucher

    the Ebonics Translator and the Gettysburg Address

    http://www.writtenhumor.com/ebonics.html Now paste this: Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether...
  6. Ace Boobtoucher

    Five out of six ****.............................

    love sack racing.:facepalm:
  7. Ace Boobtoucher

    Awkward sweat stain of the day.

    I bet if he shaved his nuts it wouldn't be so bad. Post 'em when you find 'em.
  8. Ace Boobtoucher

    How to turn Google Translate into Google Beatbox

    1) Go to Google Translate 2) Set the translator to translate English to German 3) Copy + paste the following into the translate box: pv zk pv pv zk pv zk kz zk pv pv pv zk pv zk zk pzk pzk pvzkpkzvpvzk kkkkkk bsch 4) Click “listen” 5) Be amazed
  9. Ace Boobtoucher

    Grandma's bullshit stories................

    were beginning to annoy ~whimsy~.
  10. Ace Boobtoucher

    Wow, the Silver Diner must be pretty good.

    If you get this kind of feedback you must be doing something right.
  11. Ace Boobtoucher

    Anna always had suspicions about patches.

    Cats. You just can't trust those rotten mufuckas.
  12. Ace Boobtoucher

    This is one music festival.......................

    that I'd skip. Well, this one and Tubapalooza.
  13. Ace Boobtoucher

    Accurate

    Was this an episode of "Police Story" or "Magnum, P.I.?"
  14. Ace Boobtoucher

    Roald was pretty twisted as a ***.

    I mean, c'mon man. Acid wash, tie dye AND a mullet? Psycho.
  15. Ace Boobtoucher

    Another lost dog poster?

    But this one is actually funny.
  16. Ace Boobtoucher

    The splats.

    It's what a fat girl does instead of the splits.
  17. Ace Boobtoucher

    Man, the girls at this school are a bunch of whores.

    Granted, that is just an assumption, but it's apt.
  18. Ace Boobtoucher

    Protect your Manhole!

    Christ, I didn't even realize it was in jeopardy. I guess if I were an OCSM it'd be on my wishlist.
  19. Ace Boobtoucher

    Stay cool this summer with these helpful scientifical hints.

    It's all just common sense, really.
  20. Ace Boobtoucher

    Freak Dancing Notice.

    Good to know. I have been known to freak dance myself but only when I've been **** faced and silly.
  21. Ace Boobtoucher

    You da man, Roland Washington!

    :cthulhu::cthulhu::cthulhu:
  22. Ace Boobtoucher

    The new Winnie the Pooh seems a bit...............................

    darker than the one I remember from my youth.
  23. Ace Boobtoucher

    Gay recycling bin.

    I just don't know what to say about this.
  24. Ace Boobtoucher

    Casper's worst nightmare

    Mine, too. Kind of.
  25. Ace Boobtoucher

    User reviews gone wild.

    Those customer reviews can really rub these guys the wrong way. I know for a fact they are a well oiled machine. Every time they get a new client God ***** a kitten.
  26. Ace Boobtoucher

    Kirstie Alley and the Girl Scout Cookies.

    These guys are so mean. It's delicious.
  27. Ace Boobtoucher

    L3ggy and friends.............

    the swearing-est wolves in the PBS lineup.
  28. Ace Boobtoucher

    Crazy things parents text

    .com. A fun place to waste some time. http://crazythingsparentstext.com/
  29. Ace Boobtoucher

    What's wrong with this picture?

    Women can't command starships.
  30. Ace Boobtoucher

    Etiquette tip from Eleanor Roosevelt.

    Man, she's got a face that only a guy with polio or a distant ****** could love. Too soon?
  31. Ace Boobtoucher

    That seems right...................

    and a tiny bit politically incorrect.
  32. Ace Boobtoucher

    A question for the ages.

    I've often pondered this.
  33. Ace Boobtoucher

    Chimpanzee with an AK-47

    I don't know if it's real or not but it is funny. Is it a little racist? Probably. http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81640039/?lt=em I couldn't figure out how to embed this one, so just sack up and click on the link.
  34. Ace Boobtoucher

    Challenge:

    Find the missing car.
  35. Ace Boobtoucher

    The Official Show Yourself Wearing a Hat Thread.....

    I was feeling left out of the fun of starting a bullshit new thread. Now, RESPECT MY AUTHORITY!
  36. Ace Boobtoucher

    Stan is living off the grid.

    Dirty hippie.
  37. Ace Boobtoucher

    The Official Geoff Petersen fan thread.

    I suppose you could include Craig Ferguson, too. But I really like Geoff.
  38. Ace Boobtoucher

    Meow do you know why I stopped you today, sir?

    Am I saying Meow? Yes.
  39. Ace Boobtoucher

    It's not easy being green.

    It's not easy to be fisted daily by a hippie, either.
  40. Ace Boobtoucher

    Do I look like a goddammned penguin?!?

    Get the one with a fucking owl on it, shithead!
  41. Ace Boobtoucher

    War Dog of the Week

    Great website with some touching tributes to man's best friend. http://ricks.foreignpolicy.com/category/one_time_tags/rebeccas_war_dog_of_the_week
  42. Ace Boobtoucher

    Petra didn't believe in Santa when she was little...........

    :cthulhu::cthulhu::cthulhu:
  43. Ace Boobtoucher

    It's not a suppository, Stan.

    :facepalm:
  44. Ace Boobtoucher

    Everyone deserves to be treated equally.........

    even if they're normal. Wait, wat?
  45. Ace Boobtoucher

    Apparently Superman has a tiny dick.................

    and is kinda date-rapey.
  46. Ace Boobtoucher

    99 cents for a watermelon?

    I'm in. That's a heck of a deal.
  47. Ace Boobtoucher

    Gentlemen.....................

    One of you is going to die in this episode.
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