50 Greatest Charles Barkley Quotes

[Ace Boobtoucher]

Sir Charles has said some things that make Yogi Berra seem like a Rhodes Scholar. Here's some of my favorites:

50. "I can be bought. If they paid me enough, I'd work for the Klan."

This one should have been ranked a little higher, IMO.

46. "You can talk without saying a thing. I don't ever want to be that type of person."

Wait, what?

33. After Wang has a shot blocked: "He's got to bring something stronger than that. That's like bringing milk to a bar, it's not strong enough"

29. Charles Barkley on his thoughts about retiring before the season: "I remember sitting down with the Rockets and saying, 'Yeah. I'm going to retire.' They said, 'Well, we'll give you $9 million.' And I said, 'You got a pen on you?'"

27. "I know why his name is DMX. Because his real name is Earl. Imagine if his name was Earl the rapper."

26. "If you go out with a girl and they say she has a great personality, she's ugly. If they tell you a guy works hard, he can't play a lick. Same thing."

22. "I think that the team that wins game five will win the series. Unless we lose game five."

A little insight into the way his mind works:

12. I'd never buy my girl a watch... she's already got a clock over the stove.

7. "When I was recruited at Auburn [university], they took me to a strip joint. When I saw those titties on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met my academic requirements."

Well that's just fine.

3. On Jerry Krause still being able to keep his job as GM of the Chicago Bulls: "Jerry Krause must have pictures of his boss's wife having sex with a monkey."

2. After throwing a guy through a 1st floor window in a bar Charles was in front of the judge.
Judge: "Your sanctions are community service and a fine, do you have any regrets?"
Charles: "Yeah I regret we weren't on a higher floor"

Of course there's more but you'll have to look for number one on your own.

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