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This was a really good post. Some of it is just funny, and some is really true! I admit, that in addition to wiping, I take a quick shower after every bowel movement. And believe it or not, I actually do something very much like that "bending over and aiming your asshole at the showerhead" type...

Lindsey Ward would be my favorite, but of course, she's not a pornstar. I agree with Chef, though. I wouldn't want to have relations with any pornstars.

Some very nice choices suggested for my theme song thus far. But I would have to say that this would be my favorite: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxn567bHny8

I'm scared of bugs just as much as Chef is, but I did **** a silverfish last night. Saw him on the ceiling, sprayed him with furniture polish, then windex...he dropped to the floor and I smooshed him with the windex bottle. Those silverfish are creepy things too, for those who don't know them...

You can only join if you are 18 or over, so judging by what I've seen from you in the past, no, you can't do it.

Sounds good, but remember what happened the last time we got ***** together....I'm still trying to get the stains off of the drapes! :eek:

Well there's of course always some new members that may not know me yet as a *****-swallower. :D

I like the taste of meat, but I try not to eat much of it, because I really, really, really don't like to think about where it comes from. I'm not often a hypocrite, but there it is. I like what LBP76 had to say. That philosophy makes sense to me. I feel the same way about fish. Not much...

That was kind what you said on that one thread. Nice to see you as well! I'm not on as much as I used to be, but it's nice to see a friendly face around when I happen to be checking out the boards. Have a great night my friend!

I'd like to be gangbanged by the Jamaican bobsled team.

If I had to choose, I would rather be dominated, but I like to go with the flow really and not have one person in control all the time. I think mutual pleasing type of stuff is best.

That's the great thing about the late hours like this. If this was posted during the day, it would be gone in a matter of minutes, and we wouldn't have gotten to see it. As it is, this was kind of a bonus that made my night. :1orglaugh

Exactly! I thought I was bad when I was a teenager, now I've got the (MC)rocket going off before I can even get it out!

POTW!!!! Preach that gospel, my man! I just wanna rejoice in the shadow of your BLACK ROOT and VINE!!!

15 seconds....and it took me 20 seconds to get my zipper undone That's why the folks at Freeones call me "Ol' Sploogepants".

Re: Who are you obsessed with at the moment? Blues sensation Muddy Waters No, on second thought, I second the vote for hedonis.

They're not sisters, in fact they are the very same person. Think about it, has anyone seen the two of them in the same place at the same time?

Damn, I missed out on the hothannah sex-fest! Not to mention a horny Chef! Good thing I've got my chess set right here with me in case I may be in need of a rather pointy bishop, or a nice blunt rook.

My favorite position is "The Cuckolded Husband"

That was very cool. Amazing in fact! Thanks for bringing that to us, jamrak!

^Cool. Yeah, I didn't realize what time you started the thread. The action over there has heated up since then, and I'm debating whether to join the fray!

How can you be this bored, BlueBalls? There's always some hot n' spicy action in the "has becoming a mod changed you" thread!

Some nude pics of Palin would be nice, but I'm holding out for nude pics of Joe Biden myself.

Sorry bro. Well you came to the right place, for sure. If there's one thing Freeones posters have it is sympathy and tact.

I would beat Tom Cruise over the head with his ******** Suri, then fuck Katie Holmes.

Okey dokey, Aladdin! Umm I mean Chef....

^ Blasphemer!!!!! Yeah, but the sex tape wasn't good anyway, that's for sure. The site probably isn't worth it, you can get all her glamour shots for free on ***** sites and as far as I know, she doesn't regularly do any porn shoots, so I doubt anything of value is really on the site.

Is this the right thread for me to post my pictures dressed up like Princess Jasmine from Aladdin?

I may not have become a mod, but I kinda disappeared anyway! What the fuck's up with dat? I think that the new mods are probably so busy sifting through the bs that goes on here that they don't have time for much of their regular posting. I guess it comes with the territory.

Congratulations to the winners! As I have always said, Freeones is my favorite "backside bonanza"!!!

I've never been on the news, but I was in the newspaper's police blotter once. I must admit CCT, I laughed out loud at that story you told. :D

Needless to say, our friend Magneto is nonplussed by all of this hubbub.

I agree with a few of the others who mentioned a tranquilizer *** should have been used if at all possible. The effects of using a taser on humans is up for some debate, much less a smaller 4-foot tall bird. Sure emus can be dangerous, so they should have just left it pretty much alone until...

^ No he didn't **** anyone, but I think I might have....

There's always one way to make sure there's a ***** getting to walk down the aisle. Just eliminate the pesky bride and replace her with one of your best buddies!!! :D

Just stick your wad in her face and jiggle your nutties.

I'm 30, but my penis is only 5 years old, and it also doesn't belong to me.

From your excellent description, I think I know that girl, and boy is she going to be pissed you're trying to find her pictures!

Well, you know, my friend, being a mod now, you may have a little bit of say in getting that done for me. ;) That would be fucking awesome, but really if I'm going to get that type of honor, there are certainly many other good members here who deserve it as well! hint....hint....

From what I've seen, fried chicken and watermelon seem to do the trick.

The Mets are my favorite team. I am also sexually aroused by Mr. Met's big ball of a head.

Green Day - Insomniac (album)

It just so happens I am an appraiser of that particular appendage. If you could send me a picture of it for starters, then we can arrange for an up-close and personal inspection of the item! I look forward to your reply! In fact you might call situations such as these my Freeones raison d'etre!

This thread is incredibly boring. It had such a promising title too.... My worst sexual disaster would be a dick full of **** after doing anal. Just in case, I always wear a condom while fucking someone anally.

Yes, Abe Vigoda and I had an orgasm from his very touch. Have you ever shat your pants in glee?

Some great responses here! Just checked in for some inspiration, as I am about to actually do the deed! Details will be upcoming on my blog: www.peepingpooper.edu ;)

Definitely she's a MILF!!! I just wonder if her pro-life stance will waver when she's pumping out my demonic little brown ass-babies!

I agree with Blue Balls, I would like Sarah Palin to eat my ass, and then I will impregnate HER ass with little ass-babies. Rectally yours, Senob

Well I guess it makes sense since he works there. Of course a lot of people who are into death and vampires (because of the caskets) and stuff like that may think this is a really cool idea too. I wouldn't be surprised if there were some copycats who get the idea from this.

Thanks for the request. Glad to have you as a friend. :glugglug: