What not to say when having a drink with your buddies......
- Thread starter rock hard
- Start date
"The warts finally cleared up."
Ace Bandage
The one and only.
"Your girlfriend sucks dick better than you do."
"Bob has a tighter asshole than you, John."
HE1FiNEARTiST
Banned
"2 years ago when your dad was out of town, your mother and I were talking in the kitchen and wanted to show me her blow job skills, somehow we ended up fucking in your neighbors backyard."
"Jesus loves each and everyone of you, I think it would be best if we all joined hands, bowed our heads and gave thanks collectively for all of the joy his infinite grace and wisdom has brought our lives over these coming months. Now of course, our lives aren't all joy and happiness, God tests our faith in seemingly ever increasing absurdity, but he is all knowing so to question his will is to sin and to sin is out of the question.
Bob your wife dying of ovarian cancer after a 7 year battle was tragic, but just remember she's with Jesus our Lord now and she's at peace. James, your son being run over by a drunken truck driver being blown by his sisters husband was also a tragedy. But just like I said to Bob just remember where he now is and who he's with and you'll know he's in a better place. For you see the lord works in mysterious ways but it's all a part of his plan which no one should question, no one at all. And lets not forget Peter, whose wife left him after 15 long years of a moderately happy marriage to take up refuge in Australia with his mother in what seems to have turned into a long term sodomite sinner relationship behind his back for at least 5 years but probably longer. But I say to you Peter, find comfort in the lord in your time of grief for when both of these whores of Satan die they will be met with the fiery depth of hell for all eternity.
So... let us pray."
Bob your wife dying of ovarian cancer after a 7 year battle was tragic, but just remember she's with Jesus our Lord now and she's at peace. James, your son being run over by a drunken truck driver being blown by his sisters husband was also a tragedy. But just like I said to Bob just remember where he now is and who he's with and you'll know he's in a better place. For you see the lord works in mysterious ways but it's all a part of his plan which no one should question, no one at all. And lets not forget Peter, whose wife left him after 15 long years of a moderately happy marriage to take up refuge in Australia with his mother in what seems to have turned into a long term sodomite sinner relationship behind his back for at least 5 years but probably longer. But I say to you Peter, find comfort in the lord in your time of grief for when both of these whores of Satan die they will be met with the fiery depth of hell for all eternity.
So... let us pray."
"I've just learned the truth! Have you guys ever heard of Scientology?
If it's good enough for Tom Cruise..."
If it's good enough for Tom Cruise..."
StanScratch
My Penis Is Dancing!
"i'm your father."
"Your sister is hot...but at least your brother puts out."
"This thong is killing me."
"I came in one of your beers. Guess which one!"
"I'll give you 20 bucks to grab the waitresses' ass." (Never ends good).
"OK, time to measure cocks."
"Look at that poor, pathetic bum over there. If I give him 5 bucks, I bet he gives me a gum-job."
"Your sister is hot...but at least your brother puts out."
"This thong is killing me."
"I came in one of your beers. Guess which one!"
"I'll give you 20 bucks to grab the waitresses' ass." (Never ends good).
"OK, time to measure cocks."
"Look at that poor, pathetic bum over there. If I give him 5 bucks, I bet he gives me a gum-job."
Ace Bandage
The one and only.
"Does Ronald McDonald make anyone else horny?"
"Do you guys manscape at all?"
"Does anybody have a sexier ass than Brad Pitt?"
"Does your girl ever put her finger in your ass?"
"Do you guys manscape at all?"
"Does anybody have a sexier ass than Brad Pitt?"
"Does your girl ever put her finger in your ass?"
"what's your favourite anal lube?"
"I sniff my sister's panties"
Put your fingers out and say "Wanna smell your wife"
I want to suck all your cocks, I want you all to cum on my face, I want to cut off your balls, I want to eat your balls, I want to strip naked infront of you and masturbate myself into oblivion as I roll about in the eviscerated remnants of your aborted offspring, I don’t like football.
HE1FiNEARTiST
Banned
"omg I love n'sync, tearing up my heart was the best! did any of you guys listened to that? jeepers that was a great song..... wait where you guys going? aww come on man, it was a song of my youth come back.... next round on me. fine. (*grabs a handful of beernuts and proceeds to drink alone") 
Ace Bandage
The one and only.
"Anybody else cry like a baby while watching The Notebook?"
