Random Statement Thread II

[The Yak]

It is so nice to have another person in the thread. Whether our journey together lasts for years or just one day, I can't tell you how excited I am to take this first step with you.

The post this was replying to was removed. I am not crazy!

 

[The Yak]

I don't remember coming in here. I looked up and I was in this thread. I was thinking about a story involving a crude workplace comment.

 

[The Yak]

The post they removed was a list of something I seem to recall being vaguely sexual. It was the first post here by someone other me for a few months.

 

[The Yak]

I should have gotten high tonight. Tomorrow will hit harder now after an additional day of abstinence. Delayed gratification is where it's at.

 

[The Yak]

As long as I am here so too will there be posts in this thread. This I swear on my reputation as a scientist.

 

[The Yak]

I saw thread about posting your favorite dildo or vibrator pic. It occurred I don't have any dildo or vibrator pics. Then I thought of all the other pictures I don't have. All the milestones I will miss out on which so many others simply take for granted. I will die alone, unremaked and forgotten.

 

[The Yak]

It would be weird if I were to be suddenly severely injured and be dealing with that.

 

[The Yak]

I had forgotten where I was. It is always a nice surprise to return to general awareness and find myself in the welcoming bosom of my first love, "The Random Statement Thread". We go back a long way to earliest days of me posting unhinged nonsense while under the influence of impairing substances.

Note: Yes, I'm aware this is actually called Random Statement Thread II but that is the thread's full, legal name. "The Random Statement Thread" is is more friendly and speaks to an intimacy born of long interaction and closeness.

 

[The Yak]

What if the police want to have sex with me?

 

[The Yak]

The largest fish skeleton on public display is a 41-foot (12.5-meter) whale shark at the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles County. It hangs from the ceiling, offering a stunning view of the world’s biggest fish.

 

[The Yak]

I do not think there is anyone in my life whose thighs I would rather have than the thighs I currently have.

I do not know many people.

 

[The Yak]

Somewhere in the forum there is a picture of Katy Perry in which the left half is an unflattering candid and the right is something which was professionally produced. I made the comment that I would have sex with both of those women.

 

[The Yak]

I don't think it was in her dedicated thread.

 

[The Yak]

I found it.

 

[The Yak]

Prawn carrot cake—actually a savory Chinese dish made with radish, not sweet like a dessert cake—is typically served at dim sum restaurants.

 

[The Yak]

I watched ****** Guy while high on Monday and earlier today I truly could not remember anything about the episode.

 

[The Yak]

You are six times more likely to yawn if you see, hear, read about a yawn or remember a time you yawned.

 

[The Yak]

My female parent tells the story of a time when I was very young and I pointed out an obese woman in public and my female parent was very embarrassed and apologized. To her, I extend my most sincere apologies. She did not deserve that.

 

[The Yak]

I am referring to my female parent in that apology. I am sorry that I put my female parent in that situation. Fuck that fat bitch.

 

[The Yak]

Somewhere I talk about a time I threw up at a friend's house while very young and and his female parent had to clean up my throw up and I feel guilty about that even now as an adult.

I only wrote the sentence that way to avoid the censor. The first draft used the word "v0mit" but it's not allowed.