New Girlfriend and STD's.. advice needed

[KBM]

So I have a new GF. She's extremely sexual and probably even more so than I am. No complaints there. Well we had our first encounter this past weekend and I brought condoms and tried to use them. The problem is, the way she grinds, it eventually grinds the condom right off. Add that to the fact that I was drinking and nervous and the result was a semi hardon. Shame on me. Anyway, we gave up on the condom and went bareback. I'm worried now that I could get something. I am also planning to go down on her and that's another whole issue. My concern is this; How do I ask her about her health concerning STD's? I'm more afraid of Hepatitis than anything. One can be a carrier and not even know it. It's more common too. I just don't want to offend her and have her think that I see her as a skank or something. Is there a non offensive way to go about this? Ladies? Any input?

 

[scubamike]

If you're worried, just ask. Or else move on. It's not worth risking it.

 

[calpoon]

I'd suggest that you both go down and get tested together. I know that is perhaps too much to ask for a casual sexual encounter where you should have worn a rubber, but it's pretty important if you plan on having a long term sexual relationship. If she objects to doing that, then You Might have a problem. after all what can be bad about wanting to make things clear? even if you know that you don't have anything, just get tested anyway, that way she won't think you're just trying to put it all on her, and it could be a good way to build on a relationship.

edit, also for the future if you know that the condom is more likely to break, then you should suggest some other additional forms of contraception.

 

[squallumz]

the damage is done in your case but im sure you're probably fine. you could try to offer to get tested together but its a sensitive subject, but then, maybe she has this on her mind too?

just say something about how u want her to be safe and want to have a safe and non-worrying relationship, you know, a "just in case" scenario. make sure u assure her it isn't her, that you just want her to be safe. but again, its a little late for that isnt it?

also, dont drink before sex! condoms are bad enough without the alcohol getting at you as well. its a bad combo.

 

[oorefluxoo]

go get tested now its to late. That will answer ur question.

 

[senob44]

I say get a bigger dick. Then the condom wont come off as easily.

Actually, I say tell her YOU have hepatitis. Guaranteed she will get tested lickety split. Well, either that or she'll say, "That's alright, I have it too!"

 

[hedonis]

If you're worried, go get tested. Doesn't seem like that much of a conundrum, really. If you're worried, you get tested, and come up negative, everything's probably ok.

H

 

[allan]

Wasn't male STD testing a very painful business?

 

[bodie54]

^^^^^
Not that I'm aware of. Blood and urine samples + cell testing should painlessly screen the entire range.

 

[SBTNW]

talk to her. there's nothing wrong in talking about health.
if she takes it in a bad way, dump her.

 

[jewelcity]

If you can't just be straight with her about it then you don't want her as a girlfriend.

 

[Ashleigh]

Just tell her that you want to get tested WITH her. Never ask a girl to get tested without being fully willing to get tested yourself...because FYI, STD symptoms are generally more "non existant" in males than females, so its worth for you to get tested as well. More guys SHOULD get tested...but they never do lol.

IF she gets offended, she's either insecure or she's got something to hide. In any case, dump her if she gets weird.

 

[KBM]

I say get a bigger dick. Then the condom wont come off as easily.

Actually, I say tell her YOU have hepatitis. Guaranteed she will get tested lickety split. Well, either that or she'll say, "That's alright, I have it too!"

Thanks for your insightful response! :thumbsup:

Anyway... moving on

Well, I talked to her about it today and used the "WE should get tested" approach. She said she got tested already back in September but she thinks it's a smart idea. I was all worked up for nothing. I'm pretty serious about her and she feels the same about me so... we're getting it done. I appreciate everyone's advice. Thanks!

 

[senob44]

Thanks for your insightful response! :thumbsup:

No problem. You see, I don't have any common sense either so I was baffled about how to behave in a real-life situation. I panicked and played the humor card.

 

[KBM]

No problem. You see, I don't have any common sense either so I was baffled about how to behave in a real-life situation. I panicked and played the humor card.

Aww... how cute! An internet bully! Got his ass kicked as a kid and now it's PAYBACK TIME! Go get em Tiger!!

C-:wave:-ya

 

[dave_rhino]

So I have a new GF. She's extremely sexual and probably even more so than I am. No complaints there. Well we had our first encounter this past weekend and I brought condoms and tried to use them. The problem is, the way she grinds, it eventually grinds the condom right off. Add that to the fact that I was drinking and nervous and the result was a semi hardon. Shame on me. Anyway, we gave up on the condom and went bareback. I'm worried now that I could get something. I am also planning to go down on her and that's another whole issue. My concern is this; How do I ask her about her health concerning STD's? I'm more afraid of Hepatitis than anything. One can be a carrier and not even know it. It's more common too. I just don't want to offend her and have her think that I see her as a skank or something. Is there a non offensive way to go about this? Ladies? Any input?

Just tell her that you don't want to have unprotected sex because you want to get yourself checked out first. Tell her you've never been checked. Then that will open up the conversation. You can ask her if she has ever been tested, if she says she has and she is clean then it's all good. If she says no, suggest you go together, maybe you could tell her your too nervous to do it alone.

If she get's offended and ends the relationship, she's extremely immature and it's probably for the best.

 

[KBM]

Just tell her that you don't want to have unprotected sex because you want to get yourself checked out first. Tell her you've never been checked. Then that will open up the conversation. You can ask her if she has ever been tested, if she says she has and she is clean then it's all good. If she says no, suggest you go together, maybe you could tell her your too nervous to do it alone.

If she get's offended and ends the relationship, she's extremely immature and it's probably for the best.

Thanks! She was open to it so it's all good. I made sure not to make it sound like it was just about her. Being a new girlfriend and all, I don't know her all that well yet. My biggest concern was not to offend her and she wasn't offended at all. I was married for 24 years so I'm not very well versed on new relationships.

 

[dave_rhino]

^ Sorry, I missed your post when you said you'd already spoken to her about it. Glad it all worked out ok.

Not doing this to scare you, but I got an STD off a girl who told me she had been checked and was "clean".... But I'm sure your girlfriend is much nicer than her

 

[Legzman]

You already fucked her bareback. So it's to late anyway! I say forgo condoms all together now! And enjoy all natural fuckin, it's the best way anyhow! :thumbsup:

 

[Becks...poamr]

I don't have any common sense

Truer than you other readers would realize.