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Elizabeth II.
If Elizabeth I was queen at the time England would have kicked our asses.
Listen Americans! Happy 4th of July!
- Thread starter GregCentauro
- Start date
Elizabeth II.
If Elizabeth I was queen at the time England would have kicked our asses.
Joey wins!:crowdgrinartysml:
Joey wins? I had to run out for a second. They're replaying it right now. Kobayashi was making a mochary out of our eating contest. I'm pretty sure he was taking some sort of meds to relax his stomach or something. I did used to laugh my ass off when Kobayashi would eat though. Seriously funny stuff.
Vlad The Impaler
Power Slave
Joey wins? I had to run out for a second. They're replaying it right now. Kobayashi was making a mochary out of our eating contest. I'm pretty sure he was taking some sort of meds to relax his stomach or something. I did used to laugh my ass off when Kobayashi would eat though. Seriously funny stuff.
Fuck him. Chestnut beat em straight up last year. Why didn't he participate this year? He was there.
Chestnut is a beast. Looks like he horsed down 54. Not close to the record but impressive. I wonder who has the record of 68?
Vlad The Impaler
Power Slave
Joey Chestnut. Last year.
Facetious
Moderated
Or as a popular radio talk show host says : ''would have been made into a bar of soap or made into a lampshade.'' :1orglaugh
Can do :hatsoff:
A ha! I knew that you had an ulterior motive / hidden agenda with your sudden and uncharacteristic buttering up to u.s.
:jester:Santa Barbara, Lake Tahoe and Yosemite perhaps. . . at least when the crowds go home. :thumbsup:
Tanks ! Wherever the day takes me I shall go, it's nice to not have any plans this year.
Shifty
O.G.
Sorry, I'm from Canada - I don't even know who the fuck that is. :o
So, at about 4 o’clock, two friends of ours came over for the BBQ. They’re this cool couple that my girl and I have known for years. My girl was in the back all afternoon, getting some color. At this point, all of my friends have seen her tits so it was no big deal that she was sunning topless when they got there. Hell, it’s probably the reason why I have any friends to begin with.
After 5, a few more friends came to join us. Two couples and one of my girl’s girlfriends. We were still expecting a few more. Then, at about 6PM, my buddy Eric and his wife came and knocked at the backyard fence. Without thinking, I yelled, “Come on in guys.” So Eric and his wife opened the oak gate and started walking in….and behind him was two fucking tweenagers and a boy who had to be around 9 or 10. My girl, who was completely unaware that anybody was bringing kids, was standing over the cooler, passing her friend a beer with her tits hanging out like nature intended…she saw the kids, covered her tits with her arms and RAN into the fucking house. The kids just stood their with their jaws wide open and my friend Eric and his wife just stood there clueless like they had no idea what was going on.
It turned out that they brought over their niece and two nephews seeing how we’re going to light off fireworks later on….only they never even thought to mention it before they stopped by. Now my girl wouldn’t leave the house and come outside and I had to figure out a polite way to see that the kids didn’t stick around.
My buddy Eric fed the kids some hot dogs and sodas and then brought the kids back to their parents until about an hour ago when they came off to check out the fireworks that we were lighting off. They all live about two blocks away, so it was no big deal. The youngest of the boys kept staring at my girl in awe…she, now wearing a zip-up hoodie and ugly Capri pants that I hate, however, never looked so uncomfortable. It’ll be a funny story when we look back on it, but it really did put a hamper on the night.
Still, it’s been a cool 4th. Even if we often forget just what we’re celebrating, it’s always something that all us Yanks can look forward to and be proud of. And if you disagree, you’re worse than the bloody Tories.
Anybody else have a cool or interesting night?
After 5, a few more friends came to join us. Two couples and one of my girl’s girlfriends. We were still expecting a few more. Then, at about 6PM, my buddy Eric and his wife came and knocked at the backyard fence. Without thinking, I yelled, “Come on in guys.” So Eric and his wife opened the oak gate and started walking in….and behind him was two fucking tweenagers and a boy who had to be around 9 or 10. My girl, who was completely unaware that anybody was bringing kids, was standing over the cooler, passing her friend a beer with her tits hanging out like nature intended…she saw the kids, covered her tits with her arms and RAN into the fucking house. The kids just stood their with their jaws wide open and my friend Eric and his wife just stood there clueless like they had no idea what was going on.
It turned out that they brought over their niece and two nephews seeing how we’re going to light off fireworks later on….only they never even thought to mention it before they stopped by. Now my girl wouldn’t leave the house and come outside and I had to figure out a polite way to see that the kids didn’t stick around.
My buddy Eric fed the kids some hot dogs and sodas and then brought the kids back to their parents until about an hour ago when they came off to check out the fireworks that we were lighting off. They all live about two blocks away, so it was no big deal. The youngest of the boys kept staring at my girl in awe…she, now wearing a zip-up hoodie and ugly Capri pants that I hate, however, never looked so uncomfortable. It’ll be a funny story when we look back on it, but it really did put a hamper on the night.
Still, it’s been a cool 4th. Even if we often forget just what we’re celebrating, it’s always something that all us Yanks can look forward to and be proud of. And if you disagree, you’re worse than the bloody Tories.
Anybody else have a cool or interesting night?
Vlad The Impaler
Power Slave
Not even close. That's a tweener boy's wet dream come true!
Edit: What the hell? Typing wet dream links to another freeones thread?
No not really. BBQ with the folks. The old lady has been gone for a year now (yeah, I need to get me a piece...SOON). Got a quick 9 holes in at my course and then cruised downtown to see the madness. I swear half the people driving downtown were plastered. I almost got nailed at an intersection. The cops were everywhere as well. Lots of D-Dub's gon' be handed out tonight. Serves 'em right. :nono: The humidity was so bad my shirt felt like it had been dipped in a bucket of water after my round.
He will probably remember that for life. And right now he's got a boner that won't go away.
I hope it was worth it. My girl spent an hour on google in order to see if she somehow broke a law. That might sound silly, but there are some fucked up laws still on the books.
Ace Bandage
The one and only.
Well, I'm home earlier than expected and not getting laid because apparently it's not kosher to refer to someone as a fuck buddy while in mixed company, even if it's true.
No not really. BBQ with the folks. The old lady has been gone for a year now (yeah, I need to get me a piece...SOON). Got a quick 9 holes in at my course and then cruised downtown to see the madness. I swear half the people driving downtown were plastered. I almost got nailed at an intersection. The cops were everywhere as well. Lots of D-Dub's gon' be handed out tonight. Serves 'em right. :nono: The humidity was so bad my shirt felt like it had been dipped in a bucket of water after my round.
Piece..as in piece of ass?
Yeah, I didn’t start drinking until after we lit of the fireworks, but I made a beer run at about 8 and it was obvious that people had be “celebrating” before they got on the road. And I fucking hate that shit! I’ve never once drove after I had even a single drink…yet because of all these assholes, I’ve been pulled over well over a dozen times. And since 5-0 knows I carry when they run my plates, they make me step out and do my Jesus pose at any random checkpoint.
At least you got to hit the links, man. Now tell me more about your dripping wet t-shirt….and types s-l-o-w-l-y.
Vlad The Impaler
Power Slave
Yeah, who knows. But your buddy would probably have to complain to the cops, hopefully he wouldn't do that.
Vlad The Impaler
Power Slave
Aren't you married? Or did you say that to someone else?
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