Have You Ever Been Fired From A Job?

I've been fired more times than I can count. For various reasons most often involving violence, drugs, or stealing. I got fired for being late at this one job but that was not the real reason. My manager hated me because I would emasculate him with little fella jokes in front of the gym staff. I've also quit a couple times when I heard through the grapevine that I was about to be fired. My most bizarre firing was because I intentionally chased business out of the store and I also enjoyed putting the Oriental Spike on my assistant manager until he turned from brown to blue.
 
No.
But then I've been self employed since age 26, which helps a lot. If not for that I'm sure I'd have been canned at least once by now, most likely for being insubordinate.
 
No.
But then I've been self employed since age 26, which helps a lot. If not for that I'm sure I'd have been canned at least once by now, most likely for being insubordinate.

Being self-employed is the one job I haven't been fired from yet but life is long. Sure be embarrassing having to explain to a potential new boss the cause for my termination especially if I fired myself and can provide no argument for handing myself the sack confirming that when my most recent past employer is called. Maybe I'll take my time getting home so I miss the call.
 

Ace Boobtoucher

Founder and Captain of the Douchepatrol
Hells yeah I been fired from a few jobs. My favorite was for telling an offended drunk to suck an apology out of my dick when I kicked him out of a BW3 In Omaha.
 
Hells yeah I been fired from a few jobs. My favorite was for telling an offended drunk to suck an apology out of my dick when I kicked him out of a BW3 In Omaha.

He musta been a good customer. I got fired from The Yellow Rose in Austin, Texas for using the wrong VIP's head to open the front door with after he bit a waitress buddy of mine in her butt-butt. While my GM was firing me the next day he told me, "You don't belong here. Maybe you should work at The Back Room." I asked him where this Back Room was, went there, and they hired me. I fit in there because the place was chocked full'a sleazeballs that were as bashable as they were expendable. I mouthraped some local yocal with my Glock 22 in front of my manager and didn't even receive a write-up.

Ace, I woulda loved to work some night club security with you. The fun we coulda had. You, me, and my buddy Nazi Tarzan in the Big Smile Club.
 
I got fired from a after school golf course maintenance job when I was 17 for leaving a Cushman outside of the maintenance shed all night and it got stolen. That was certainly justified.
 

Elwood70

Torn & Frayed.
I got fired from a job once because I got busted napping in my car in the parking lot with an open beer in the cup holder. The thing is, I'd already had a new gig lined up by that point, so I didn't care. If the manager knew even half the shit we got away with at that place, he's still be freaking out.

One example: I worked a Saturday shift drinking 151 and Coke.
 

Ari Dee

Official Checked Star Member
Only once and it took me a while to get over because I definitely shouldn't have been fired.
I was managing retail and the owner fired both employees on my shift too.. after he let me work for another hour because he didn't want to do some shit himself.

Sucks getting fired from a job you wanted to quit many times but were too loyal to :p
The job sucked to begin with because all my employees were teenage girls that were clearly hired on looks alone.
 
I once resigned with immediate effect because the alternative would have been a hearing with a realistic outcome of termination for gross misconduct, but since I resigned and retained a reference I can easily explain it away as "no longer agreeing with the company's conduct, or that of the industry overall." It actually then helps explain my 18 month gap on the C.V. which I describe as "taking time out for personal reasons, travel, broadening my horizons and deciding what I wanted to do with my life."

Which sounds better than "staying up all night wanking then sleeping until 3 in the afternoon."
 

xfire

New Twitter/X @cxffreeman
On more than one occasion I've worn out my welcome to the point that if I hadn't found another job and left on my own I would have been fired. Over the course of my "career" I've probably been in and out of at least half a dozen jobs, more if you count part time stints, "seasonal", temporary, and contract. Fuck, I hate working.
 

Mr. Daystar

In a bell tower, watching you through cross hairs.
Twice, once when I was 15, and worked at a garden center. I was putting a small tree, in a smaller trunk, and broke it, beyond healing. It cost $125 bucks, and they told me, besides the fact I did that, I didn't seem to hustle fast enough, when hand unloading 50 pound bags of wet mulch, from unbelievably hot 48 foot trailers.

The second was about 13 years ago...I put a 32 foot dump trailer on it's side in the middle of a road that was having a new fresh water pipe line installed into it. I have a problem with this one because of several reasons, mainly because I followed the instructions of someone, and should've known better to raise the bucket, when I saw it shift as it came off of the frame. I was also pissed because the equipment was a sad, and pathetic example of rolling crap. In today's world, that semi would have been scraped by law, and I would refuse to drive it, in this day and age. It was also a closed section of road, so they were loading these trucks 10 or 20 thousand pounds over weight. It was weird, I was talking to another driver about my concerns regarding laying one over, because I had plenty of semi experience, but not a lot of dump truck experience, and there is a big difference. The owner figured that she could charge more per hour for a semi, then a straight truck, and no one else had a class A CDL. So they took me around ONCE, told me that's how you do it, and let me go on my own. It was surreal, I got back in my tractor, and was thinking about it not 5 minutes before it happened...I wonder what it's like to see one go over, then it happened. I watched for what seemed like an hour, but was only about 10 seconds, and it just slammed on the ground, twisted the frame, and yanked the tractor axles off the ground about 2 feet, and threw me out of the seat.
 

ChuckFaze

Closed Account
I've never been fired, but I HAVE been in The Dog House twice. :eek:

On the 1st one, we used to have this dictator for a manager. I am not kidding ... he could not say anything be it in a memo or verbally without punctuating it with a threat of, " ... or I'll find someone who CAN." One day he gave us a survey to fill out regarding how things were going on in the shop. Well, I was one of the VERY few brave enough or stupid enough to fill out the survey truthfully. Not surprisingly, the dictator didn't like my answers and feedback. He immediately failed me in my review about 2 weeks later. He then started making my life a living hell. You see ... as much as he liked to threaten to fire everyone, he really didn't fire people. He more liked to make your life a living hell so that YOU would QUIT. Sort of like Drill Sergeants in the military who won't throw you out, but rather, they want to force YOU to Drop On Request.

Luckily for me, the dictator went on a 2 week vacation. Mysteriously, he didn't seem to be returning upon the 2 weeks being up. Suddenly there was a shop meeting and we were succinctly informed that the manager AND his useless wife whom he had made a Supervisor although she had no skills ... had both been abruptly reassigned. We never heard any solid details. But, rumors said that the dictator and his useless wife had been found to be involved in shady activity. Nice to get out of the Dog House. :rofl:

In the 2nd one, it was just one of those cases where from the word go, you just don't like, don't get along with someone. With the Boss having the advantage, I of course wound up in the Dog House. That time I left for another job. It was very interesting how the results of a change in scenery were like night and day. Went from the bottom of the totem pole to virtually the top very quickly.
 

Petra

Cult Mother and Simpering Cunt
Closest I got was a demotion. Basically the juvenile facility I worked at let it's administration get out of hand and they waited until the yearly check came up to try to get it in order. I was a newly promoted case manager so they let me take the blame (even though there was NO WAY I could have fixed it in the allotted time) so they could get an extension on it getting done. Now that I think about it, I think that's the only reason I was given the position.

Now I work for myself and god, my boss is such a raging bitch. :suicide:
 
Top