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My number's not international. How come you never call me? :confused: :(

:pukey: No, thank you.

Can I post naked pictures of myself and answer the interview interview questions? :D

What could possibly be more embarrassing than BEING Ronald or Andrés? Just remember to freeze the paintballs overnight the night before the event. :D

Oh, dear... :uohs: :eeew:

I feel dirty and ******** when someone beats off to my pictures.

Roses or orchids?

Re: Ask me anything naughty or nice... or dirty & kinky *hehe* xXx Do you believe in time travel?

Put sugar in their salt shaker.

:scream: BALLS!!! :scream:

She was probably with someone who was asking how to survive a mountain lion ******, and she just ran while the cat snacked on the guy.

I'll make the sacrifice. Besides, Briana's already said she was gonna marry me. :lovecoupl

I once gambled and lost. I had to change my pants afterwards... :eek: :o

So, does that mean that when I go visit you and Nick I can go see you at work and you'll keep me boozed up on the house? :D

Re: Ask me anything naughty or nice... or dirty & kinky *hehe* xXx Well, I definitely wouldn't mind stopping there... :shy:

Mmm... ****... :****:

What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you?

Wouldn't Jaana have an unfair advantage over everyone else, though? That's not true because it's impossible for someone who doesn't have anything remotely ugly to bump uglies. :lovecoupl

But will you let him go?

It wouldn't last. How many OCSMs could go without their cellphones, makeup, Starbuck's, or dogs for more than 3 days? "Ooh! I chipped a nail! I have to go!" It would be kinda hard for him to do it; he's dead, jenius. :tongue: Cows don't have penises. Bulls do. :tongue: If nothing else, you...

Now, THAT was a good remark. Try making more of those, and less of the "Wah, everyone's a dick to me because I'm new" remarks, and you'll fit in in no time. :thumbsup:

I had a classmate in ninth grade who told us that at his previous school guys would jack off during class. They would see who could jizz the fastest and the farthest. :eeew:

Oh, dear. People here are just so rude and insensitive...

:sheep:

I did spotlight for Jimmy Buffett last October. I had a margarita during Margaritaville. :thumbsup:

My grandmother used to make the best lengua a la veracruzana I ever had. It's tongue in tomato sauce with olives, potatoes, capers, bay leaves, and I have no idea what other ingredients it had, but it was way better than barbecued angel wings. :yummie:

Johnny Cash - Sunday Morning Coming Down

Re: Ask me anything naughty or nice... or dirty & kinky *hehe* xXx Eh, to hell with **** tasting and a massage. Wanna fuck? :love-smi: :bedbounce: :nannerf1: :D

In civilized parts of the world that's known as a limp biscuit.

Put slices of bologna on their car. :D

Put Icy-Hot in his jock strap before practice. I thought you weren't mad at me anymore. :confused:

Re: Ask me anything naughty or nice... or dirty & kinky *hehe* xXx That can be arranged. I have a queen size, and I'm only using half of it... :lovecoupl

Squally told me he does that sometimes, except they don't have a computer in the room.

Hardly. Whenever I'm in a ********-type place I play Pai Gow Poker. It's a slow, relatively low-risk game where bets last a bit longer because the odds are petty even for everyone. Whenever I do ******, though, I pick a set amount that I'm willing to lose, usually $20 bucks, and never take my...

Why? Is ***** running for Miss Thingamabobber? :drool1: :hit:

I miss my Finduilas. :******: Alligator ain't bad. I've had alligator fajitas before. A bit tougher and gamier than beef, but not half bad. Balut? :throwup: My Filipino roommate once tried to get me to try that ****. I was actually about to do it, but I wretched from the smell. Damn, you ARE...

Put sand in their KY. :thumbsup:

I used to love garlic frog legs when I was a ***. Surprisingly enough, my affinity for the dish went away after I had a pet bullfrog. :(

I can't really remember what the last really weird thing I ate was. It might've been wax moth larvae tacos. Not half bad. They had the consistency of chicharrones. I've got some Marmite for you... :baconsalt: :pukey:

I have a third leg. Just sayin'... ;)

Wait, who's Tom Harrison? You mean Tom Harrison the transvestite midget clown porn producer? Or is it Tom Harrison the Al Qaeda sleeper cell jihad terrorist bomber mastermind? You gotta be more specific, man. :D

Sorry. I didn't know that if I did you up the butt it would rub your throat. I'll put a lozenge on the tip of my dick next time. :nannerf1:

Third Shift amber lager

Re: Ask me anything naughty or nice... or dirty & kinky *hehe* xXx I just bought a six pack of Third Shift amber lager, which I had heretofore never heard of, but was on sale for $5 bucks at Safeway. My question is, would you like to come over and try it? It's really not half bad. ;)

:drool1:

I'd like to see one with a prosthetic arm or leg. Then they could take it off as part of a strip tease. That would be hawt.

Longboard

Can I have an autographed picture of you? :iloveyou:

No, that ungrateful turd never said anything. You actually LIKE me?!? Why? Did squally bribe you? :suspicious:

Nope! If there ever comes a day when I belong to the cool ****, please, by all means, feel free to slap me. I was just trying to, you know, nudge her into having an ask me anything thread. I made one for Ronald last week (or was it two weeks ago? I can't remember. Time is fun when you're having...