What should I name my penis?

"I'm so lonely...oh so fucking lonely! Why won't anyone pay attention to me! I mean, I'm a normal guy. With normal needs. Why can't anyone appreciate me for who I am? It's not like I want to get married or anything...I just want to spend time with someone! I just want some release! The voices...the voices in my head are so loud, I can hear them exploding to get out...I must find some release to this tension! There is the neighbor's cat again. Please...don't let me **** again..."

That is what I've named mine, but I'll let you have it, Ike. I've thought of calling it Patton, anyhow, because of the helmet.
 
Mrtrebus?
 
Possibilities:

Pennis the Menace
The Ramburglar
The Giving Tree
Wrinklebeast
Acorn Andy
Johnny Come Early
Third Arm of Justice
The Zipper Ripper
Everybody Loves the Nubbin
Lance Wyoming
Gertrude Frankenstein
Twinkie
The Exxon Valdenis
Tony the Hustler
The Littlest Traffic Cop
Abdullah (the Tent Maker)
Donald Pump
Admiral James T. Cock
President Johnson
Kaptain Kielbasa
Old Drizzly
Federal Love Project
Chief of Staff
Pope John Pole III
Thor's Hammer
King Leer
Schtuppopolis
The Molten Mushroom
The Powerprawn
Scepter of Sordidness
Horseman of the Ahumpalypse
Regurgitator of Rejuvenation
E.T.'s Stinkfinger
Niagara Balls
Meat Maelstrom
Trembling Torpedo
King Ohyeah
Buster McThunderstick
Madeleine Albright
The Viscount of Veins
The New York Post
Winnie the Cock
The Sixth Beatle
The True Cross
The Fleshy Winnebago
The Squinty Blowpop
The Slim Reaper
Jack Kerouwacker
The Naughtiest Cardinal
Master's Pincushion
The Teeny Bopper
 
Oooh. "Patton" 'sreally good
But, Patton died from injuries sustained in a jeep crash while out hunting birds! So, I don't know if I would name it for someone who actually died while hunting birds! Ha ha ha

Here's a good one: Dick Cheney! Everyone knows you'd be hard pressed to find a bigger dick!!!
 
The Golden Ram.
 
Possibilities:

Pennis the Menace
The Ramburglar
The Giving Tree
Wrinklebeast
Acorn Andy
Johnny Come Early
Third Arm of Justice
The Zipper Ripper
Everybody Loves the Nubbin
Lance Wyoming
Gertrude Frankenstein
Twinkie
The Exxon Valdenis
Tony the Hustler
The Littlest Traffic Cop
Abdullah (the Tent Maker)
Donald Pump
Admiral James T. Cock
President Johnson
Kaptain Kielbasa
Old Drizzly
Federal Love Project
Chief of Staff
Pope John Pole III
Thor's Hammer
King Leer
Schtuppopolis
The Molten Mushroom
The Powerprawn
Scepter of Sordidness
Horseman of the Ahumpalypse
Regurgitator of Rejuvenation
E.T.'s Stinkfinger
Niagara Balls
Meat Maelstrom
Trembling Torpedo
King Ohyeah
Buster McThunderstick
Madeleine Albright
The Viscount of Veins
The New York Post
Winnie the Cock
The Sixth Beatle
The True Cross
The Fleshy Winnebago
The Squinty Blowpop
The Slim Reaper
Jack Kerouwacker
The Naughtiest Cardinal
Master's Pincushion
The Teeny Bopper

LOL

Waterboy?
 
Jörmundgandr.
 
Originally it was "Fuckram" but I feel like that's kind of played out so now I'm thinking "Nixon".

Any thoughts?

Be nostalgic... Name it John Harry for some good friends... John (Holmes or Leslie, your choice) and Harry Reems. Give it as a "confirmation name" Ronald after Ron Jeremy as well.

:) ;) :) ;) :) ;) :)
 
Leviathan?
 
Back
Top