What Position Would Jesus Prefer in Sex?

[The Dildo]

Got into a conversation about this last night. Heard a guy on the radio who was saying that he has sex with some of the members of his church. And I naturally thought "Well, whoever could have sex with Jesus should have done it, or she's going to hell." Then, I started thinking about what position Jesus would prefer in sex. Not just vaginal intercourse, but all types of sex.

Anyone else have some ideas how Jesus might like to hit it? Maybe some freaky things he liked to try that I didn't mention here?

Discuss.

 

[L3ggy]

 

[ApolloBalboa]

Ahem.....the "cross" position.

I'm definitely going to hell now.

 

[GregCentauro]

Passive anal sex. He likes getting nailed hard.

 

[sz_matters]

Wonder if any of the chicks he banged screamed "Oh God".

Fucking a chick while she's screaming out your ***'s name would be a major wood killer. :yesyes:

 

[STDiva]

He seems like a traditional kind of guy. My guess is missionary.

 

[sproing99]

Jesus is definitely a bottom. He loves Rupert to give it to him right up the **** chute.

 

[magicspore]

Wonder if any of the chicks he banged screamed "Oh God".

that reminds me :

A priest is called ******
A Bishop your Grace
A cardinal your eminence
A pope his holiness
But only an hourglass bikini chick is called "Oh my god"

So no. :clap:

 

[PirateKing]

He masturbates while the woman watches






...Relax people, If he exists I'm sure he found that to be hilarious.

 

[BlueBalls]

Whatever way Muhammed tells him he likes it.

 

[vodkazvictim]

Missionary, obviously.

 

[psychofrank]

He likes it up the ass.

 

[GodsEmbryo]

I can't imagine him going "OH Yeah Bitch, suck it GOOOOOAAAAD... Slap me baby YEEEEEEHAAAAAA !! " giving a thorough deep throat while hanging on chains from the ceiling in a rubber red outfit.

But the church never seems to amaze me lately...

So it's probably worse.





(I'm so getting screwed for this)

 

[Shifty]

You sons 'o bitches are all going to hell! :flame:

 

[Gape_Fan]

12 man ******* bang (no bread or fish, that's just in bad taste). Judas can help Jesus get wood.

Too soon?

 

[lurkingdirk]

He does have quite an ego, so likely the superman position.

Google it.

 

[anairhead999]

He does have quite an ego, so likely the superman position.

Google it.

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: