this personal ad in my forum made me die laughing

Kelly Steele

Verified Performer
Verified Performer
You got to check this out!
Someone posted this in my site's forum. I nearly died laughing from it!

Age: 46
Height: 5'
Weight: 140
Occupation: Retired paralegal/Web designer/personal trainer

Sexual History: Before I got married, I kept the names of men I ***** with in a binder.

I have herpes, but I don't give it away. I've got fabulous boobs, and I'm only slightly overweight. My skin, however, is embarrassingly loose from years of yo-yo dieting. I have a golden retriever and five rabbits. The dog ****** on my bed, and the rabbits live in the kitchen. My health is good except for the chronic depression, the two heart attacks I had last year, the sciatica, and the degenerative joint disease. I am a recovering **** addict, a recovering bulimic, a recovering shopaholic, and a recovering sex addict.

REDEEMING QUALITIES:
I have integrity and a great sense of humor, not to mention money and brains, but I won't date you unless you do, too
 

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