Sorry.. just have to rant about my wife

[Facetious]

"the kid comes first" is the righteous answer but it ain't going to fly in the context of todays marriage example. You see, we've become enlightened, we're progressives now, you don't actually expect people to make sacrifices do you ? A kid is only half as important as our custom cup of joe every AM.

we're so dead

 

[No_Man]

Its hard to give advice without knowing you or your wife. But from what you've described, it sounds like your arguments are escalating really fast, which is typically a sign that:

1) You're not arguing about "socks" or whatever mundane topic came up. You're arguing about something more fundamental to your relationship and socks are just the catalyst.

2) You need help. Professional help. Not friends or family or the peanut gallery of a porn forum. A trained therapist.

 

[Facetious]

There used to be a time when there was actually a father figure around the house when we guys were children. We would look at dad as a good example for a family setting and we didn't have to ask questions. As we became teens our fathers would begin explaining the complicated minds, bodies and chemistry women. Where is that example today in the seemingly encouraged single parent family atmosphere ? At best, fathers are nothing more than sperm donors and are treated like doormats !

That's all

 

[bodie54]

Actually the kid comes first.

It really amazes me when people propose that staying in an unloving, unsatisfying relationship somehow equates to putting the kid first. Er, no it doesn't. All it actually does is force the child to marinate in a toxic envirionment until they're finally old enough to escape it, at which point they're certain to be burdened with psychological scars from growing up under such strained, artificial circumstances.

Not saying you're advocating that Mr. P, but so many do, and it's absolutely ridiculous.

Naturally divorce is difficult on kids too, but at least it's decisive and emotionally honest, and therefore the lesser of evils. If you've got a rotten tooth you're far better off pulling it than suffering chronic pain and a compromised immune system.

 

[jibbijib]

Tell her to shut her mouth and quit bitching.


If she can't be appreciative of the fact that you are actually sticking with her through it, and making an effort then tell her to go fuck herself. Go to a lawyer and figure out what you can do to seclude her from having any of your belongings, and then just show up with the papers. Tell her to smarten up and appreciate it, or she can sign her name on the dotted line and say goodbye.

 

[pussy+dickdenice]

I wanted to start with a quote from Blue and then as I went along, I found there are numerous posts that is to be quoted. I stopped thinking of the quoting of posts.

Blue, lets ask a few question. Please answer them truthfully without any justification. Not on the board, answer them to yourself.

When is the last time you and your wife communicated? I mean, communicated, not talked. Once, after your marriage, you knew what she is thinking. Do you know that, still now?

You didn't specify how long you are married. Is it the seventh or eighth year of your marriage? It's a proven thing that on the seventh year the spouse feels she/he is neglected and Marriage is a bad investment of his/her life. At least you sounded so. You love the lady, but there is the feeling of "she-don't-understand-me" in your mind. If they together weather these two years, normally they are on the way to "happily-ever-after."

It's very personal, but do you cuddle her while you two on the bed? If not, think why you don't do it any more. Too much of space is bad for marriage. Feel possessive.

Is the son, about a year old? If so, have you recently told her "you look beautiful." If not, when you said that last? Girl's feel they have lost the ability to attract the baby's father. They feel insecure. I felt the same after Ava's birth. dd was kind enough to assure, several times, 'I am the only girl for him'.

It appears to me, she wants attention from you. She draws it through the son, whom, she is sure, you love. She cribs about small things, as she feels, you are not interested enough to look in to her problem. Do you feel, she has a point there?

If all the question is answered in your favor, without any justification, then talk to her. Sit down and decide the coarse of your life. Whether together or alone. Before that, think of your son's life. You together brought him in to this world. That's a great responsibility. But that should also not become a shackle for you, otherwise you will hate your son someday, in future. He doesn't deserve that.

BTW, I'm professionally attached to the field of psychology. But I'm no expert. Before going to a counselor, take a look at both of you together. The psychologist will make you do the same thing, with a cost.

So invest some time to your happiness, without spending fees to the counselor. Go on a picnic with your family. That may give a different perspective to both of you.

 

[LBP 76]

Excuse me for overposting.
Let this guys post be a lesson for everybody, men and women.
Be careful who you marry or have kids with.

Being alone can suck, but marrying and/or having kids with the wrong person is much worse.

Problem is, many people change or take off the mask once theyv'e got you hooked, so you gotta be real careful.

Blinded by love, or loneliness can have very bad results.

Although I don't agree with part of your earlier post that he should stay with her for financial reasons.
I strongly agree with this post.

Anyone that thinks being alone is SO BAD has obviously never felt trapped in a loveless relationship.
It's FAR worse.
And the worst part is, you often don't realize just how bad it really is. The emptiness slowly and quietly envelopes you.

 

[naldo]

you might not be fucking her to full exhustion. when a women is excessivly bitchy it sometimes is the result of her not being satisfied sexually i believe the japenese term roughly translate to- fucking her out. you gotta put a rubber band on your dick and really smoke that pussy try pulling her hair while your doing it. a good indicator that your doing it right is the whole fuckin place will soaked with pusy juice and she will just sort of wonder around the house with her head cocked to one side humming with a wierd look on her face. it worked for me.

 

[pussy+dickdenice]

Blinded by love, or loneliness can have very bad results.

So? No one is perfect. How do you conclude that some one was blinded by love, if he doesn't fall in love? Love is an emotion. Like all other, love requires nurturing. Believe me, lots of us take it for granted. Even son feels his mother must love him, just by right and vice versa. Do we nurture a relationship, as it should be?

Tell her to shut her mouth and quit bitching.


If she can't be appreciative of the fact that you are actually sticking with her through it, and making an effort then tell her to go fuck herself. Go to a lawyer and figure out what you can do to seclude her from having any of your belongings, and then just show up with the papers. Tell her to smarten up and appreciate it, or she can sign her name on the dotted line and say goodbye.

Have a look from the other side too. She too is actually sticking out with him. its not one sided. And most of all, you are being Judge and Jury with only one side of the evidence, without learning about the other side. Do you feel that is fair?

Although I don't agree with part of your earlier post that he should stay with her for financial reasons.
I strongly agree with this post.

Anyone that thinks being alone is SO BAD has obviously never felt trapped in a loveless relationship.
It's FAR worse.
And the worst part is, you often don't realize just how bad it really is. The emptiness slowly and quietly envelopes you.

You get trapped, if you let your self get trapped. I don't want to repeat, but was there a conscious decision involved, prior to marriage, on both sides? Or did the head took a south-ward journey, prior to the marriage?
Have a little faith on the person whom once you thought was the best. May be she still is; given a chance.

I live a very turbulent (not sexually ) but very contented, happy married life. I always feel, without exploring all the options to save my family relationship and running away with the easiest one is the coward's way out.
But that is me. No one is to opt for the same view.

 

[meesterperfect]

It really amazes me when people propose that staying in an unloving, unsatisfying relationship somehow equates to putting the kid first. Er, no it doesn't. All it actually does is force the child to marinate in a toxic envirionment until they're finally old enough to escape it, at which point they're certain to be burdened with psychological scars from growing up under such strained, artificial circumstances.

Not saying you're advocating that Mr. P, but so many do, and it's absolutely ridiculous.

Naturally divorce is difficult on kids too, but at least it's decisive and emotionally honest, and therefore the lesser of evils. If you've got a rotten tooth you're far better off pulling it than suffering chronic pain and a compromised immune system.

Yeah youre right.
I should have been more precise.
It is true, no matter what the kid comes first but that doesn't necessarily mean staying together.
Its true that could be even worse, being around such misery.

 

[pussy+dickdenice]

It really amazes me when people propose that staying in an unloving, unsatisfying relationship somehow equates to putting the kid first. Er, no it doesn't. All it actually does is force the child to marinate in a toxic envirionment until they're finally old enough to escape it, at which point they're certain to be burdened with psychological scars from growing up under such strained, artificial circumstances.

Not saying you're advocating that Mr. P, but so many do, and it's absolutely ridiculous.

Naturally divorce is difficult on kids too, but at least it's decisive and emotionally honest, and therefore the lesser of evils. If you've got a rotten tooth you're far better off pulling it than suffering chronic pain and a compromised immune system.

I've always found you very succinct and straight forward, bodie. But I feel, you and so many of you, have a blinder. I don't know, there may be just causes to be a Cynic, but that's sad. You are looking at marriage from only one angle. A system of destruction. It's not. It's the most fulfilling experience in life. Your marriage vow, states it very clearly. (Mine is read in Sanskrit and have a three hour duration. I went to sleep midway.) "You are together in good and bad."
What you would have called me, your pd, if I ran for the easiest coarse of action when dd fell down and all of us believed he was gone for good? "a bitch?"

That option, believe me, was available to me. I found lots of my nearest and dearest, took that option. They separated. I didn't have money at that time, as we have today.

It was that institution of marriage that kept me on the coarse and you, the entire board, who shared my thought every evening, encouraged me to fight on and not to loose faith. If that communication on the net gave me so much, can I not ask others to communicate between two persons face to face.
Don't look at it in the Men's way. Have a look as a human being, without a gender bias.

Are you sure, pardon me NavyBlue, you have been told the truth, the absolute truth. Just because he is a man, doesn't guarantee that what he said is the ultimate truth.

If all the question is answered in your favor, without any justification, then talk to her. Sit down and decide the coarse of your life. Whether together or alone. Before that, think of your son's life. You together brought him in to this world. That's a great responsibility. But that should also not become a shackle for you, otherwise you will hate your son someday, in future. He doesn't deserve that.

BTW, I'm professionally attached to the field of psychology. But I'm no expert. Before going to a counselor, take a look at both of you together. The psychologist will make you do the same thing, with a cost.

So invest some time to your happiness, without spending fees to the counselor. Go on a picnic with your family. That may give a different perspective to both of you.

And yes, I looked at it from the boy's view.

Have a happy time.

 

[titsrock]

I think this part of pussy's post is very good

When is the last time you and your wife communicated? I mean, communicated, not talked. Once, after your marriage, you knew what she is thinking. Do you know that, still now?

It's very personal, but do you cuddle her while you two on the bed? If not, think why you don't do it any more. Too much of space is bad for marriage. Feel possessive.

Is the son, about a year old? If so, have you recently told her "you look beautiful." If not, when you said that last? Girl's feel they have lost the ability to attract the baby's father. They feel insecure.

It appears to me, she wants attention from you. She draws it through the son, whom, she is sure, you love. She cribs about small things, as she feels, you are not interested enough to look in to her problem. Do you feel, she has a point there?

Does any of this make sense in your situation, Navy? If it does not, than Bodie's reply is realistic.

You shouldn't come to a porn board to look for a green light to end your marriage from people who have no vested interest in what you do.

However, (based also on a previous post I remember you posting in another thread about not having decent sex anymore with your wife)...maybe there is a communication and a romantic/spark issue between you which may not require the finality of divorce. I would talk to your wife first--lay your cards on the table--and see if you can both compromise toward rediscovering "the spark" basically.

 

[Facetious]

If you try and talk to her i feel she won't listen at all, and this will frustate you further. The only people she might talk to are her family, you may have to approach her mom or dad and tell them the situation DELICATELY!!! Ask them to talk to your wife, but they have to be subtle or she may react even worse to the intrusion.
Your wife somehow needs to realise there is a problem, so that she can agree to see doctors or counsoling.
This may be tempory, BUT, she may may fall into a habit of being a bitch even after her post pregnancy depression is over.

Ol' Cabs here wasn't born yesterday . . I take it :hatsoff:

Seriously, It's all here in this post ^. Granted, I only know 1/2 the story but I know that it takes some women time to settle down post pregs. It's natural and it's common.

 

[blackbull1970]

You'd think that, since it's Xmas everybody will be in a joyous mood? Well it's not happening to my wife and now I am not in a holiday spirits either.

My wife is always so annoyingly and frustratingly naggy. For example, if I pick a clothes for my son to wear, she'll complain that it's too small or not right for that time. She would pick the smallest things to argue with me, with her reasons that she had told me a thousand times and I would still do the same thing over and over, or that I should have know what she wants and do accordingly. Excuse me? How the hell do I know what she wants? Yet she keeps using that to accuse me of doing things wrong.

Just 30 mins ago she came downstairs (where I was having breakfast) and gave me the evilest stare, while telling me I put the wrong socks on our son again. I knew she cleaned the shelf where we put the baby's clothes and put the ones deemed too small away, so I picked a pair of socks from that shelf on the baby, and yet she still says it's too small, blah blah blah. So I told her I think it's the right size, and she insisted that that's not what she would have the baby wear, so I told her she always complain too much and that she's way too picky about everything. When she shot back that I am picky too, I almost told her that if I was picky I would never have married her, but held my tongue. After calling me an idiot she stormed back to the room where the baby is sleeping and closed the door, so I guess she don't want me to see the baby for rest of the day.

I've just about had it with her. She wants everything done to her liking or she'll raise a stink about it. She says I don't take care of the baby but I work full time while she's a house wife and I had to spent nights and weekends helping her with the baby and she's still not satisfied. I am very tempted to call a divorce lawyer and see what my options are. I took tomorrow's off from work and she rather have me go to work so she don't have to see me, well I may just leave to see a lawyer instead. What should I do to make her understand it's not just her way or the highway. I am sick of always having to defend myself about the things I do around the house. Nothing is good enough for her unless she's the one doing it. Help.

I understand your pain playa. But what you wrote isnt a reason for divorce. She is just going thru typical female behavior after having a kid.

I was in the same boat. What you gonna have to do is just lay down the law on her and be firm and direct. I aint saying for you to hit her, that is wrong, but you are gonna have to let her know who is the boss in that house and tell her to get her act together.

Females for some reason dont think straight and their minds get more confused after they start popping out kids.

Peace.

 

[BlueBalls]

I wanted to start with a quote from Blue and then as I went along, I found there are numerous posts that is to be quoted. I stopped thinking of the quoting of posts.

Blue, lets ask a few question. Please answer them truthfully without any justification. Not on the board, answer them to yourself.

When is the last time you and your wife communicated? I mean, communicated, not talked. Once, after your marriage, you knew what she is thinking. Do you know that, still now?

You didn't specify how long you are married. Is it the seventh or eighth year of your marriage? It's a proven thing that on the seventh year the spouse feels she/he is neglected and Marriage is a bad investment of his/her life. At least you sounded so. You love the lady, but there is the feeling of "she-don't-understand-me" in your mind. If they together weather these two years, normally they are on the way to "happily-ever-after."

It's very personal, but do you cuddle her while you two on the bed? If not, think why you don't do it any more. Too much of space is bad for marriage. Feel possessive.

Is the son, about a year old? If so, have you recently told her "you look beautiful." If not, when you said that last? Girl's feel they have lost the ability to attract the baby's father. They feel insecure. I felt the same after Ava's birth. dd was kind enough to assure, several times, 'I am the only girl for him'.

It appears to me, she wants attention from you. She draws it through the son, whom, she is sure, you love. She cribs about small things, as she feels, you are not interested enough to look in to her problem. Do you feel, she has a point there?

If all the question is answered in your favor, without any justification, then talk to her. Sit down and decide the coarse of your life. Whether together or alone. Before that, think of your son's life. You together brought him in to this world. That's a great responsibility. But that should also not become a shackle for you, otherwise you will hate your son someday, in future. He doesn't deserve that.

BTW, I'm professionally attached to the field of psychology. But I'm no expert. Before going to a counselor, take a look at both of you together. The psychologist will make you do the same thing, with a cost.

So invest some time to your happiness, without spending fees to the counselor. Go on a picnic with your family. That may give a different perspective to both of you.

I'm sorry :rofl: I thought you were talking to me I thought I might have gotten Parkinsons disease all of a sudden. Do I have a wife? I thought to myself.



Read BlueBalls READ!!!! :crash:

 

[bodie54]

I've always found you very succinct and straight forward, bodie.

Thank you PD and the same to you.

You are looking at marriage from only one angle.

Not at all. I agree with you that marriage can be the most fulfilling experience in life, and that wedding vows should never be entered into lightly. But I wasn't commenting on marriage as an institution.

My concern is for children with parents who, despite having completely disfunctional relationships, delude themselves into thinking they're doing their kids a favor by staying together.

Children always suffer from growing up in such environments. I've seen that in my extended family. I see it often; couples who try to mask a loveless, contentious, disconnected existence thinking that somehow their children won't pick up on that pretense. As a mother you know how exquisitely tuned in children are to their parent's emotions. They almost always sense or know when something's off between their parents, especially when it's chronic.

What you would have called me, your pd, if I ran for the easiest coarse of action when dd fell down and all of us believed he was gone for good? "a bitch?"

I'm not seeing the parallel here, PD. At no time was your love for your husband in question, and my post was addressing marriages in which the love is gone.

 

[deaded666]

Um, yeah I've pondered this and... You should screw one of her friends!
No but seriously, you should express how you feel, go to counseling whatever it takes. Unless of course you don't give a shit about her then refer to option A. Good luck my friend. :thumbsup:

 

[NavyBlue]

I wanted to start with a quote from Blue and then as I went along, I found there are numerous posts that is to be quoted. I stopped thinking of the quoting of posts.

Blue, lets ask a few question. Please answer them truthfully without any justification. Not on the board, answer them to yourself.

When is the last time you and your wife communicated? I mean, communicated, not talked. Once, after your marriage, you knew what she is thinking. Do you know that, still now?

You didn't specify how long you are married. Is it the seventh or eighth year of your marriage? It's a proven thing that on the seventh year the spouse feels she/he is neglected and Marriage is a bad investment of his/her life. At least you sounded so. You love the lady, but there is the feeling of "she-don't-understand-me" in your mind. If they together weather these two years, normally they are on the way to "happily-ever-after."

It's very personal, but do you cuddle her while you two on the bed? If not, think why you don't do it any more. Too much of space is bad for marriage. Feel possessive.

Is the son, about a year old? If so, have you recently told her "you look beautiful." If not, when you said that last? Girl's feel they have lost the ability to attract the baby's father. They feel insecure. I felt the same after Ava's birth. dd was kind enough to assure, several times, 'I am the only girl for him'.

It appears to me, she wants attention from you. She draws it through the son, whom, she is sure, you love. She cribs about small things, as she feels, you are not interested enough to look in to her problem. Do you feel, she has a point there?

If all the question is answered in your favor, without any justification, then talk to her. Sit down and decide the coarse of your life. Whether together or alone. Before that, think of your son's life. You together brought him in to this world. That's a great responsibility. But that should also not become a shackle for you, otherwise you will hate your son someday, in future. He doesn't deserve that.

BTW, I'm professionally attached to the field of psychology. But I'm no expert. Before going to a counselor, take a look at both of you together. The psychologist will make you do the same thing, with a cost.

So invest some time to your happiness, without spending fees to the counselor. Go on a picnic with your family. That may give a different perspective to both of you.

I'll admit, we don't communicate much anymore because it's always about the baby or bills or something else entirely. We've been married for 2 years and have a 14 month old son. We don't cuddle but we do kiss from time to time (only because I want to though)

I am not sure where the problem lies between us. She can be pretty normal or even caring toward me, but she can also be a complete bitchy person and I hate that. I prefer to have a companion who's not as hot tempered or wanting things done her way all the time. I have started to ask her permission to do certain things because she'll get pissed if she finds out I didn't inform her. It could be simple as putting clothes in the dryer but she wants certain clothes to be air dry and others to be machine dry. It's to a point where I feel I don't have control over my life, just a yes man more or less.

you might not be fucking her to full exhustion. when a women is excessivly bitchy it sometimes is the result of her not being satisfied sexually i believe the japenese term roughly translate to- fucking her out. you gotta put a rubber band on your dick and really smoke that pussy try pulling her hair while your doing it. a good indicator that your doing it right is the whole fuckin place will soaked with pusy juice and she will just sort of wonder around the house with her head cocked to one side humming with a wierd look on her face. it worked for me.

We haven't had sex in a long time, nor do I feel like initiating sex. To tell you bluntly I would love nothing better than having sex with another woman but I am not the cheating type so I have to find porn to satisfy me.

Although I don't agree with part of your earlier post that he should stay with her for financial reasons.
I strongly agree with this post.

Anyone that thinks being alone is SO BAD has obviously never felt trapped in a loveless relationship.
It's FAR worse.
And the worst part is, you often don't realize just how bad it really is. The emptiness slowly and quietly envelopes you.

I still love my wife but at this point I also don't see us staying together forever. My parents were divorced when I was 3 or 4 and I feel like I am heading that way. Loveless marriage is something I want to avoid at all costs.

I think this part of pussy's post is very good


Does any of this make sense in your situation, Navy? If it does not, than Bodie's reply is realistic.

You shouldn't come to a porn board to look for a green light to end your marriage from people who have no vested interest in what you do.

However, (based also on a previous post I remember you posting in another thread about not having decent sex anymore with your wife)...maybe there is a communication and a romantic/spark issue between you which may not require the finality of divorce. I would talk to your wife first--lay your cards on the table--and see if you can both compromise toward rediscovering "the spark" basically.

I am still trying to find a way to express to her how I feel and to let her know, to stop treating me with no respect and to listen to my side for once. Maybe if our marriage is on the rocks will she realize how wrong she is. I'll give it another year then decide what I should do.

 

[pussy+dickdenice]

Thank you PD and the same to you.

I'm honored.

Not at all. I agree with you that marriage can be the most fulfilling experience in life, and that wedding vows should never be entered into lightly. But I wasn't commenting on marriage as an institution.

My concern is for children with parents who, despite having completely dysfunctional relationships, delude themselves into thinking they're doing their kids a favor by staying together.

Children always suffer from growing up in such environments. I've seen that in my extended family. I see it often; couples who try to mask a loveless, contentious, disconnected existence thinking that somehow their children won't pick up on that pretense. As a mother you know how exquisitely tuned in children are to their parent's emotions. They almost always sense or know when something's off between their parents, especially when it's chronic.

You know, where we differ bodie? It's in the attitude to the marriage itself. This is a relationship. It needs to be nurtured.

dd as I have several time expressed, have become obsessive about earning money. After that near disaster, he feels he should give us more financial security. Look at it from his POV, it's justified. Look from mine, it's excessive. I have lost the loving, smiling person that I had. But surely he is better than the brain-dead vegetable, that I could have had with me, because we had no money to get him treated.

You know, about half year back, I thought, enough is enough, let him earn to his heart's content. I don't want the machine to lay down with me on the bed, as and when he can afford to. Let's divorce and get on my life as I wanted to prior to the accident.

I sat down and thought. What should I have? A financially secured life with Ava? Take a risk to find out another man who may not be dd but some one else, who will love me?

I found, I was opting for the second best. dd is the best, and he is worth fighting for. I was asking to revert back to a situation, what was very much well treaded and known. I had stopped adjusting. I was selfishly asking dd to change what he has become.

We don't want to change a person whom we love, we change ourselves.

I forced dd to take a few days leave. Went to a holiday. Remember those weekends, I advertised on the board? and then said, how I enjoyed them? I told dd what I felt. I asked him point blank, what he wants.

We two mature adults, cried buckets when we started talking. There was no accusation from any of our side. We adjusted to the need of each of us. His feeling that if anything happens to him, we two should not suffer. I told him, my need to have his companionship. To have time for Ava and I. We decided that I get in to the psychology practice once again, so that I earn some money and that goes to Ava's education fund. We agreed to adjust to each of our needs and he himself, cut down his out station activity. He employed more people so that he can give us more time. (Not on the board, though. ). BTW, go to the share a joke, there is "dd's dirty mind" :rofl:

I'm not seeing the parallel here, PD. At no time was your love for your husband in question, and my post was addressing marriages in which the love is gone.

See bodie, the parallel is there. It could have been a love-less marriage, if we let it. Thank God, we didn't.

I'll admit, we don't communicate much anymore because it's always about the baby or bills or something else entirely. We've been married for 2 years and have a 14 month old son. We don't cuddle but we do kiss from time to time (only because I want to though)

I am not sure where the problem lies between us. She can be pretty normal or even caring toward me, but she can also be a complete bitchy person and I hate that. I prefer to have a companion who's not as hot tempered or wanting things done her way all the time. I have started to ask her permission to do certain things because she'll get pissed if she finds out I didn't inform her. It could be simple as putting clothes in the dryer but she wants certain clothes to be air dry and others to be machine dry. It's to a point where I feel I don't have control over my life, just a yes man more or less.

We haven't had sex in a long time, nor do I feel like initiating sex. To tell you bluntly I would love nothing better than having sex with another woman but I am not the cheating type so I have to find porn to satisfy me.

I still love my wife but at this point I also don't see us staying together forever. My parents were divorced when I was 3 or 4 and I feel like I am heading that way. Loveless marriage is something I want to avoid at all costs.

I am still trying to find a way to express to her how I feel and to let her know, to stop treating me with no respect and to listen to my side for once. Maybe if our marriage is on the rocks will she realize how wrong she is. I'll give it another year then decide what I should do.

Only thing I can say, Blue, (not Balls with the blue color, ). Please read my answer to bodie and your quote together. You may find the coarse of action that you seek. I just described a brief experience of my life. If you need more, please pm me.

 

[pussy+dickdenice]

I'll admit, we don't communicate much anymore because it's always about the baby or bills or something else entirely. We've been married for 2 years and have a 14 month old son. We don't cuddle but we do kiss from time to time (only because I want to though)

This is the first step, Blue. Take that step. Start communicating. Talk to her, tell her about this board and what you have said over here. Tell her you love her, You want her to be in your life, warts and all, but you can not go on to be at the receiving end all the time.

I am not sure where the problem lies between us. She can be pretty normal or even caring toward me, but she can also be a complete bitchy person and I hate that. I prefer to have a companion who's not as hot tempered or wanting things done her way all the time.

Did you tell her these exact words? Go on a few dates with her. Then one evening sit down and tell her this. She is neither a mind-reader nor God. Let her know what you think.

I have started to ask her permission to do certain things because she'll get pissed if she finds out I didn't inform her. It could be simple as putting clothes in the dryer but she wants certain clothes to be air dry and others to be machine dry. It's to a point where I feel I don't have control over my life, just a yes man more or less.

Don't ask what you call permission. Share the views. Adjust to her timing and to succeed, she too has to accept your need of going to games, going through the porn forum at your private time. Your son may hinder these activities. But find time. Get her involved in what you like to do. Involve yourself in her area of work. I'm now a consultant to dd's HR function. I don't work under him but with him. Take her down so that she sorts out the clothes those are to be air-dried and machine-dried. It will make her feeling needed.

We haven't had sex in a long time, nor do I feel like initiating sex. To tell you bluntly I would love nothing better than having sex with another woman but I am not the cheating type so I have to find porn to satisfy me.

Remember those days in the park. When you were flush with anticipation for a heavy petting session. Bring them back. On your own. Don't make it sound "You are my wife, and, I have rights". As it comes out from the letter, you are the more responsible person in the team. Act responsible.

I've a suggestion. Ask for a light bondage session with your wife. I did and our sex-life changed like a lightning. We used only a bath towel, no rope, nothing else. But from the master I became the victim. I loved it. It makes a change from the humdrum sex. Variety brings spice to your life. If you don't want to be so adventurous. Do what you want, like giving your wife a oral pleasure. That is craved by almost all woman, but never expressed. You know what she loves best, make a twist of the same theme and apply. It will make a difference.

I still love my wife but at this point I also don't see us staying together forever. My parents were divorced when I was 3 or 4 and I feel like I am heading that way. Loveless marriage is something I want to avoid at all costs.

You are afraid, fate is going to repeat. No, it's not. Your parents were different people, with different values. You create your own destiny. It's up to you whether your marriage will remain loveless. You are the boss here.

I am still trying to find a way to express to her how I feel and to let her know, to stop treating me with no respect and to listen to my side for once. Maybe if our marriage is on the rocks will she realize how wrong she is. I'll give it another year then decide what I should do.

That's a great decision Blue. We are with you. We all are on this board. I was saved once. You too will get the happiness you deserve, with or without the woman presently in your life.

Best wishes once again. :hatsoff: