I'm not odd. I like masturbating in front of my gf and she likes watching me
It was very liberating the first time I fingered myself in front of her 
So today i asked my GF to masturbate in from of me...
- Thread starter masterfaster
- Start date
I'm not odd. I like masturbating in front of my gf and she likes watching me
It was very liberating the first time I fingered myself in front of her 
And this is why the lap dances are even better when the stripper is crying
And this is why the lap dances are even better when the stripper is crying
IsobelWren
Official Checked Star Member
Dan Savage had this really cool column where a guy wrote in with a problem similar to yours. Dan parsed that the woman was uncomfortable with her body and perhaps had never masturbated before. I'm assuming that your girlfriend has, since most women have these days, but it's something you should ask her in the most kind and least loaded way possible.
Make sure that she knows that you think her pussy is lovely and beautiful and that you love it as a treasured part of her. Perhaps next time she covers it, put your hand over hers and quietly ask her not to do that. Slowly try to move her hand away. It's got to be very romance novel shit.
Now. To the masturbating part. Here's my paraphrasing of Dan Savage's advice. Let her get all the tools she needs to do it. Now, let her blindfold you and tie you up so that you can't see her or touch her or speak to her. Turn off the lights. She masturbates with you in the room. Next time, maybe she feels comfortable enough that she can masturbate with you only tied up, not blindfolded. Then maybe next time she can turn on the lights. Then maybe next time she can let you sit next to her. Then help, then, etc etc. I can see how it would totally work.
Make sure that she knows that you think her pussy is lovely and beautiful and that you love it as a treasured part of her. Perhaps next time she covers it, put your hand over hers and quietly ask her not to do that. Slowly try to move her hand away. It's got to be very romance novel shit.
Now. To the masturbating part. Here's my paraphrasing of Dan Savage's advice. Let her get all the tools she needs to do it. Now, let her blindfold you and tie you up so that you can't see her or touch her or speak to her. Turn off the lights. She masturbates with you in the room. Next time, maybe she feels comfortable enough that she can masturbate with you only tied up, not blindfolded. Then maybe next time she can turn on the lights. Then maybe next time she can let you sit next to her. Then help, then, etc etc. I can see how it would totally work.
IsobelWren
Official Checked Star Member
I mean. I do naked and masturbating for a living and even I have problems with my crotch and how it looks/smells/tastes sometimes...much of the time. So it's definitely something to appreciate that an every day normal girl could have some serious issues with it.
try to give her some more time
A lot of girls/women suffer from what my mom calls "the good girl" syndrome by wich she means that girls are still being raised to think that sex is a bit dirty and that if your a good decent girl you're not supposed to enjoy it and be open about it even tho sex is the most enjoyable and liberating thing on earth.
I would suggest having her "help" you while you are getting her off with your fingers. If you do it that wsy it might be a little less uncomfortable for you.
You want her to masturbate in front of you while you're just watching? Not like where you're just doing it together but separately, as it were?
I'm a guy, and I wasn't brought up to think that sex is dirty, but if my wife asked me to masturbate in front of her, with her just watching, I don't think I would. It's not because I'm ashamed of the way my genitals look. And even thought I don't think there's anything shameful about masturbation as such, it still seems like doing it in front of someone -- someone who's right there in front of me, just watching for the sake of watching -- would be humiliating (which is fine if you're into humiliation, but I'm not, and I take it your gf isn't either). In that situation, the person who's masturbating is making themselves vulnerable without any reciprocation from the other. By contrast, if you're having sex, usually you're both vulnerable (unless one of you is tied up or something like that).
So I would say, offer to masturbate it in front of her first (if you haven't already). Show her that you're willing to be vulnerable to her in that way, and maybe she'll get more comfortable and trust you enough to do it in front of you. And if she doesn't want to watch you, then that's a place to start. Because if she's uncomfortable about masturbation in general, it will be easier for her to get more comfortable if you're the one doing it, if you're the one being vulnerable. If you can get her to feel that it's OK to watch you, then you're halfway there.
I'm a guy, and I wasn't brought up to think that sex is dirty, but if my wife asked me to masturbate in front of her, with her just watching, I don't think I would. It's not because I'm ashamed of the way my genitals look. And even thought I don't think there's anything shameful about masturbation as such, it still seems like doing it in front of someone -- someone who's right there in front of me, just watching for the sake of watching -- would be humiliating (which is fine if you're into humiliation, but I'm not, and I take it your gf isn't either). In that situation, the person who's masturbating is making themselves vulnerable without any reciprocation from the other. By contrast, if you're having sex, usually you're both vulnerable (unless one of you is tied up or something like that).
So I would say, offer to masturbate it in front of her first (if you haven't already). Show her that you're willing to be vulnerable to her in that way, and maybe she'll get more comfortable and trust you enough to do it in front of you. And if she doesn't want to watch you, then that's a place to start. Because if she's uncomfortable about masturbation in general, it will be easier for her to get more comfortable if you're the one doing it, if you're the one being vulnerable. If you can get her to feel that it's OK to watch you, then you're halfway there.
Buy her a new purse, in exchange. :dunno:
Well i would feel strange doing this for a male friend. Partly i do not masturbate much and i hardly ever do it to orgasm. Masturbating to orgasm leaves me feeling empty inside - see for me and i think for some, not all girls, orgasm is not everything in sex - i could be very fulfilled sexually without one, men are different.
Masturbation as well for a lot of people I think is sort of private sex, you do it by yourself. You Might be willing to get very dirty in lots of ways but still not feel right masturbating in front of someone else. So maybe she has to get over this too.
Also for me it seems like a really selfish thing to do when i would want to do something for the man.
Yes and i would be shy about my body as well, you guys are pretty critical and open about girl's bodies on here so most girl's will wonder how they shape up for you. I think it is healthy when you can feel confident about your body but it takes a while to do that and to be able to see your body as a sort of thing that is separate from you for men to enjoy.
Maybe you also need to ask her what sort of stuff she enjoys, that she would like you to do. Take it easy and speak to her bit by bit, maybe just doing small things until you can gradually get you both more comfortable about talking about anything sexual.
Try talking to her when you are having sex telling her when she is doing something you really like and asking her to do more of it and asking her when you are doing stuff if it is something she really likes, gradually pushing out from what you are actually doing now rather than getting her to do something completely new. And there might alreay be times when you are having sex when you can look at her pussy and tell her for example how much you like seeing it - make her more comfortable about it through what you are doing now.
Masturbation as well for a lot of people I think is sort of private sex, you do it by yourself. You Might be willing to get very dirty in lots of ways but still not feel right masturbating in front of someone else. So maybe she has to get over this too.
Also for me it seems like a really selfish thing to do when i would want to do something for the man.
Yes and i would be shy about my body as well, you guys are pretty critical and open about girl's bodies on here so most girl's will wonder how they shape up for you. I think it is healthy when you can feel confident about your body but it takes a while to do that and to be able to see your body as a sort of thing that is separate from you for men to enjoy.
Maybe you also need to ask her what sort of stuff she enjoys, that she would like you to do. Take it easy and speak to her bit by bit, maybe just doing small things until you can gradually get you both more comfortable about talking about anything sexual.
Try talking to her when you are having sex telling her when she is doing something you really like and asking her to do more of it and asking her when you are doing stuff if it is something she really likes, gradually pushing out from what you are actually doing now rather than getting her to do something completely new. And there might alreay be times when you are having sex when you can look at her pussy and tell her for example how much you like seeing it - make her more comfortable about it through what you are doing now.
Similar threads
