Sex too good to cheat?
- Thread starter Member2019
- Start date
People keep missing the point ...
So let's answer the hard questions here!
I'm just curious how many of you guys wish your partner was better in bed, and how many have acted upon that.
That's what the poll is about, period.
I think if we took a poll, 99% of people would think cheating is wrong, so no need to post that you think it is wrong.
So let's answer the hard questions here!
I'm just curious how many of you guys wish your partner was better in bed, and how many have acted upon that.
That's what the poll is about, period.
Dude I am engaged and I love her but I think monagomy just stems from insecurities in MOST instances.
Hmmm, interesting point ... "insecurity" drives monogamy
First off, I posted a previous poll entitled Monogamy: An Aphrodisiac?
http://board.freeones.com/showthread.php?t=90876
I find monogamy a great aphrodisiac myself.
Why, in pure honesty, could have something do to with what you just said.
As much as I felt I was "confident and forward," although not really a "player," but definitely "adventurous" when I was dating,
I will admit that with each and every new lover, I was insecure, had my doubts and fears and what not.'
And I never inserted (into her vagina) before I was married (not even with my wife to be), because of need to feel secure.
As I've stated in other threads, I don't like to "stop and hand myself," I like to keep "pumping" as I'm ejaculating.
So now with my wife, I have a major level of comfort and security.
No limits, all options, all fun, one woman, anytime we want, etc...
No longer just between her DDs (although I still love it), our oral sex has become more and more intense with each passing,
and when it comes to intercourse, it's anything goes, very explicit, without a care or worry and is just mind boggling at times.
In fact, now that you mentioned "insecurity," my wife even plays on it, which makes it more intense.
It just feels so "wrong" -- definitely at the core of "insecurity" -- to "pie" her, completely unload, and she just picks on that all while I pump her.
Indeed, I have a real issue and male "insecurity" with intercourse, and without the "security and comfort" of monogamy I don't think I can do it.
Again, interesting points, and I decided to be open and honest about it, instead of take offense to what you stated.
At least it applies for me, I can't answer for others.
I've also argued that no one should dislike polygamous lovers just because they are.
That's letting one's values (insecurity?) dictate what others can and can't do, who may not have one's same values (or insecurity?).
I don't engage in polygamy, and didn't marry a woman who values polygamy, because I find it makes everything far more complicated.
But I have stated that if my wife wanted another lover in the bedroom, I would not let my fear (definitely insecurity) dictate her happiness and let her.
It's fine to be insecure, as long as it doesn't affect others -- that's my view and I'm sure some will differ.
Hmmm, interesting point. Let's look at that for a bit.
First off, I posted a previous poll entitled Monogamy: An Aphrodisiac?
http://board.freeones.com/showthread.php?t=90876
I find monogamy a great aphrodisiac myself.
Why, in pure honesty, could have something do to with what you just said.
As much as I felt I was "confident and forward," although not really a "player," but definitely "adventurous" when I was dating,
I will admit that with each and every new lover, I was insecure, had my doubts and fears and what not.'
And I never inserted (into her vagina) before I was married (not even with my wife to be), because of need to feel secure.
As I've stated in other threads, I don't like to "stop and hand myself," I like to keep "pumping" as I'm ejaculating.
So now with my wife, I have a major level of comfort and security.
No limits, all options, all fun, one woman, anytime we want, etc...
No longer just between her DDs (although I still love it), our oral sex has become more and more intense with each passing,
and when it comes to intercourse, it's anything goes, very explicit, without a care or worry and is just mind boggling at times.
In fact, now that you mentioned "insecurity," my wife even plays on it, which makes it more intense.
It just feels so "wrong" -- definitely at the core of "insecurity" -- to "pie" her, completely unload, and she just picks on that all while I pump her.
Indeed, I have a real issue and male "insecurity" with intercourse, and without the "security and comfort" of monogamy I don't think I can do it.
Again, interesting points, and I decided to be open and honest about it, instead of take offense to what you stated.
At least it applies for me, I can't answer for others.
I've also argued that no one should dislike polygamous lovers just because they are.
That's letting one's values (insecurity?) dictate what others can and can't do, who may not have one's same values (or insecurity?).
I don't engage in polygamy, and didn't marry a woman who values polygamy, because I find it makes everything far more complicated.
But I have stated that if my wife wanted another lover in the bedroom, I would not let my fear (definitely insecurity) dictate her happiness and let her.
It's fine to be insecure, as long as it doesn't affect others -- that's my view and I'm sure some will differ.
While I "sometimes" 'have sex' with my wife - I've mostly "made love" to her.
Those terms are worlds apart.
I won't deny that there have been times when pure lust has won over "pure love" and we've fucked each other silly. But there have been far more times when we've celebrated "us" in one of the most intimate ways we know....
There is a reason it is called "making love".
Our 'celebration of us making love' also brought us the joys of children - as unexpected and unplanned as they were.
As such sir, I disagree with your innate opinion that monogamy stems from insecurity [the "in most instances" is redundant, don't you think?].
In fact, what is to stop me from saying that the ones who are not "satisfied" with monogamous relationships are the ones actually suffering from "insecurity"???
What stops me is my own philosophy on such things - free adults are free to choose relationships as they mutually agree to. You want to be married to 5 women and five men ... that is your headache. It is also "your business". I don't really care - so long as everyone involved is in it of their own free will.
Now, despite the fact that my wife and I never exchanged "wedding vows" before a priest nor did we get a 'certificate' from the government [common law is wonderful!] --- I believe fidelity is inherent to marriage.
Meaning? If you are man enough to marry the love(s) of your life, you are also man enough to tell her/him that it just isn't working out and you need to split.
cheers,
PS: My vote on the poll is along the lines of Ms. "Snow White Queen":
I'm assuming "pornstars" doesn't include hookers at Tan Son Nhut and Saigon ?
Never have needed to cheat on my girlfriend we have been together for 3years and are getting married in the spring, she puts porn stars to shame, maybe because she is open to anything I have in mind. plus she is into threesomes with other girls because she is Bi wich I do not object to 
OK let me clarify what I meant by that.
However I have been with a girl and we were together for over a year and we had an open SEXUAL relationship and their were rules to having sex with others. We obeyed those rules at all times and the 3 most important were that we had to be honest about who we slept with and if the other did not approve we did not continue with it. They other ppl had to be tested for STD'd and Aids. And there could never be a date with our other sexual partners because that would be having sex and we only FUCKED other ppl. To us it was no different then masturbation because it was only for a physical feeling. I do not see much difference then that and ppl who watch porn and picture themselves having sex with the woman on the screen.
Now this relationship worked out for us and for me and one other girl I had dated.. In both of those relationships the woman were perfect 10's and I was lifeguarding as well as my normal job so there were no shortages of available partners for either of us.
By Monagmy I did not mean to imply polygamy because that involve's RELATIONSHIPS with another and that is not, in my opinion, the best for most ppl.
I do stand by that only having sex with one partner in a number of peoples lifes, and not all, comes less from wanting to be closer to that one person. More from being insecure in if that person will stay with you, if you are good in bed, if you are attractive enough and so on. Now that does not mean I think monogamy is not for some ppl or that it does not have its merrits. I just feel that especially with my age group (21) it comes more from insecurity then from love.
I could not agree with you more. I think there are three sexual acts. Making love, having sex and fucking. Fucking is just what you do for the physical sensation and nothing else. I Make love to my fiance, I would never fuck her. She does not believe in having an open relationship and due to my love for her I have not touched another girl as long as we have been together. If it is not consensual then that is cheating and I do not advocate that course of action.
However I have been with a girl and we were together for over a year and we had an open SEXUAL relationship and their were rules to having sex with others. We obeyed those rules at all times and the 3 most important were that we had to be honest about who we slept with and if the other did not approve we did not continue with it. They other ppl had to be tested for STD'd and Aids. And there could never be a date with our other sexual partners because that would be having sex and we only FUCKED other ppl. To us it was no different then masturbation because it was only for a physical feeling. I do not see much difference then that and ppl who watch porn and picture themselves having sex with the woman on the screen.
Now this relationship worked out for us and for me and one other girl I had dated.. In both of those relationships the woman were perfect 10's and I was lifeguarding as well as my normal job so there were no shortages of available partners for either of us.
By Monagmy I did not mean to imply polygamy because that involve's RELATIONSHIPS with another and that is not, in my opinion, the best for most ppl.
I do stand by that only having sex with one partner in a number of peoples lifes, and not all, comes less from wanting to be closer to that one person. More from being insecure in if that person will stay with you, if you are good in bed, if you are attractive enough and so on. Now that does not mean I think monogamy is not for some ppl or that it does not have its merrits. I just feel that especially with my age group (21) it comes more from insecurity then from love.
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