yeah, paypal sucks. its ebay know u know. same people officially. unless the site is run by a small group like lets say http://www.dirtylittlechloe.com/ or something like that (i love you chloe! ) u might be able to negotiate privately for them to take a paypal payment (not that im saying chloe would but its more of a site where i can actually contact the right person), but bigger sites like vivds site and all that, forget about it.
i know ive asked certain vendors on a certain site if they would take it and they said sure and gave me their paypal id, etc.