I'm a Pastafarian:
- Spaghetti provably exists, and it tastes absolutely fantastic with marinara and meatballs.
- We know that things on Earth can fly, including pasta, birds, and drug users.
- Monsters are real, such as Killer Tomatoes and Aphrodite.
Ergo, The Flying Spaghetti Monster exists; the logic is irrefutable. His Noodly Appendage is out there, somewhere, contemplating all of us. He watches and waits for the inevitable moment in time at which each of us shall join Him and bathe blissfully in the sublime deliciousness of His Lake of Marinara amidst His Noodles ... forever and ever.
Ramen.
Disclaimer: The FSM may or may not actually be
![Cthulhu :cthulhu: :cthulhu:](https://media.freeones.com/forum/data/assets/smilies/cthulhu.gif)
. Consult your local Italian restaurant for authoritative spiritual advice. Getting this wrong could result in an eternity of being devoured, digested, excreted, and eaten again with no possibility of dying and no pasta to be found.
BTW,
do not consult the pasta priests at Olive Garden: they lie -- in wait, in words, and in the sink (filled with marinara, natch, the blasphemers!) on the job. They're just terrible, so please don't. The pah-riests at Carrabba's are acceptable Chakotay spirit guides in lieu of genuine unchained Italian pah-riests.