Fact About Yourself Thread
- Thread starter The Captain
- Start date
ChefChiTown
The secret ingredient? MY BALLS
I have a beard and I kinda want to shave it, but...I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll look like a little boy without it, because, well...I do look like a little boy without facial hair.
Oh, and I also suck.
Oh, and I also suck.
I was in Wasilla, Alaska in 1987 and 1992. Didn't see Bible Spice, though...
I ride an '02 Kawasaki ZX-12R.
ChefChiTown
The secret ingredient? MY BALLS
I talked to another grown man on the phone, while he was lying in his bed last night.
Whilst wonering down the many roads I walk, I began to contimplate upon something, something so special, so strange so extreme that my face went red and people began to look at me in strange ways. Yes I heard a few whispers "look at that guys face" I heard but all is well dear friends but for a few more steps I turned the corner and was out of site of the brewing mob. Okay lets get back to the facts, it wasnt a cold day, quite humid actually the sun was shining high as it usually does the birds were silent and the traffic was loud, look at the ass of this one, GodDamn!..........Oh sorry I got a little distracted, so where was I? Oh yes, the traffic was loud but still I walked, I went into the local shop and baught a 500ml bottle of coke for 89p and as is the custom began to drink.
Nothing really special happened during those supsiquent minutes although my idea was still circulating around and around in my mind and I couldnt shake it, it was a good idea there was no arguments there but something in my mind still wasnt sure why I was thinking about this and what I was going to do about it. And so I walked, and walked, and walked until my legs became tired and I couldnt be bothered to walk anymore.
By this time I was about 10 miles away from my cardboard box under the bridge so I decided to get the bus home, it was a nice journey, about 20 minutes all in all I sat on the top deck, and these kids behind me were making to much noise so I shouted at them and begen singing a loud as I could, what song? did I hear you ask Whats New Pussycat by Tom Jones, if you must know, this soon shut them up but I could still hear them laughing, I was just about to go back there and piss on them when they got off, lucky bastards. About 10 minutes later I was back, I walked the short way back to my place, took off my shoes (I think I need some new ones these are pretty worn out) and my jacket to look at my shirt soaked in sweat, I mean I knew it was hot but I couldnt feel myself sweating, I put that one on God, he's probably trying to tell me something.
Later on Im going begging with my friend Sheena, shes an ex heroin addict and prostitute she lets me hit that from time to time, but not as often as I would like, its not that shes all that good looking, its just that you dont get many female hobo's anymore. Which is a shame if you ask me.
When I got into the box that night I fell right to sleep, I had had a few drinks which helped block out the cold, but still this idea was circulating in my head.
When I awoke the next morning I had been robbed and I had wet the bed, ah well, onwards and upwards is what I always say.
:wave:
Nothing really special happened during those supsiquent minutes although my idea was still circulating around and around in my mind and I couldnt shake it, it was a good idea there was no arguments there but something in my mind still wasnt sure why I was thinking about this and what I was going to do about it. And so I walked, and walked, and walked until my legs became tired and I couldnt be bothered to walk anymore.
By this time I was about 10 miles away from my cardboard box under the bridge so I decided to get the bus home, it was a nice journey, about 20 minutes all in all I sat on the top deck, and these kids behind me were making to much noise so I shouted at them and begen singing a loud as I could, what song? did I hear you ask Whats New Pussycat by Tom Jones, if you must know, this soon shut them up but I could still hear them laughing, I was just about to go back there and piss on them when they got off, lucky bastards. About 10 minutes later I was back, I walked the short way back to my place, took off my shoes (I think I need some new ones these are pretty worn out) and my jacket to look at my shirt soaked in sweat, I mean I knew it was hot but I couldnt feel myself sweating, I put that one on God, he's probably trying to tell me something.
Later on Im going begging with my friend Sheena, shes an ex heroin addict and prostitute she lets me hit that from time to time, but not as often as I would like, its not that shes all that good looking, its just that you dont get many female hobo's anymore. Which is a shame if you ask me.
When I got into the box that night I fell right to sleep, I had had a few drinks which helped block out the cold, but still this idea was circulating in my head.
When I awoke the next morning I had been robbed and I had wet the bed, ah well, onwards and upwards is what I always say.
:wave:
Im held prisonner in a basement. There is 5 gorgeous woman taking turns to rape me each few hours... I cant sleep. They keep me drunk with out-of-price red wine... They feed me with exotic meals they are cooking. And cheese. And fresh fruits. They allow me few hours each evening to come here posting a little. One of them even try to suck me while i type this.... Help! I want to be FREE like fresno!
Ok.
A serious fact about myself now.
Im not in the situation described above
ChefChiTown
The secret ingredient? MY BALLS
I want to give Hannah an STD.
But, I'll need to get one first. Where, oh where, would they beeeee...
:thinks for a second:
:snaps fingers:
GOT IT...
icks up the phone:Hello, operator? Could you connect me to Tara Reid please?
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