Dear Bennihanna:
My ******* year-old ******** is taking her girlfriend to the prom. Yes, I said GIRLfriend. I have tried to convince her otherwise, but to no avail. I also found some copies of Maxim under her mattress, along with some movie magazines where she cut out the faces of Brad Pitt and Leo DiCaprio and replaced them with Portia deRossi. Should I worry, or should I just accept her "alternative lifestyle"?
signed, Desperate In Detroit