bad gas at work

[lurkingdirk]

what do you people do about gas at work? i let 'em rip, but then when people come into my office, i'm sure they notice it's none too fresh. and of late my gas has been so horrendous even i've had to leave my office for stretches of time to let it clear.

should i burn incense? get a can of spray? or should i embrace it, and when people come in and obviously notice it, simply say, "yeah, that came from my ass."

???

 

[DOA82]

Id rethink your diet first off if I were you

 

[lurkingdirk]

Id rethink your diet first off if I were you

man, i did. i'm eating healthy.

 

[power-san]

I enjoy gasing it up.. who gives a fuck?

 

[friendsofmine]

thats when you go talk to someone you dont really care for and let one silently slip out ----------then bail

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

Oh lord...:rofl:


don't be doing that around the pretty ladies. :uohs:


I used to have bad gas, but for some reason, I don't get it anymore. don't really knnow why either, because I eat pretty bad and drink like a fish out of water. just try to shit before you go to work and get everything out of your system. take laxatives before you sleep at night, drink a pitcher of coffee in the morning, and eat a fully loaded omlet and you will be running to the john. :moon:

That should alleviate the problem, I think.

Dr. Dirk signing off.

 

[gunslingingbird]

You are talking to The Fart Master, my friend! My favorite is crop dusting a group of unsuspecting guys that are doing something and don't see me walk by. It's great fun when I do it while I'm rigging. There's nothing quite as fun as watching a guy trying to pull 90 pounds of chain 80' to the beams, gasping for air because you decided to share last night's barbecue and chili-cheese fries, and this morning's hard-boiled eggs with him. Sometimes, if a buddy of mine and I have to work with some shithead that we don't like, we'll sit there roasting him from both sides all day long. It's great fun to do it when I'm a truck loader. There's been I don't know how many times when me and the other 3 guys in the truck have been about to stack a 200 pound lighting box, only to have 2 of them abort the operation and run out of the truck, gasping for air.

These past 2 weeks have been REALLY bad, as I've learned how to make a killer habanero and cilantro salsa. It tastes great, but it wreaks havoc on my digestive system, and, consequently, on anyone near me. The other day my poor dog actually ran out of the room and went to hide under her blanket. :1orglaugh

:hatsoff:

 

[Violator79]

LOL what a coincidence!! I'm actually watching George Carlin and the part is about farting in public, and I come across this thread!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMX8L7Yxyfk

Release a test fart!!

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

Seriously, that's foul man. an ass whoopin' is what someone would get if they pulled that shit by me (pun intended). It's seriously disheartening to see women all proud of that shit too. My girls sister acts all 'farty' and shit and likes to play around with it. fuck that. stankin ass hoes - there''s nothin worse!

 

[lurkingdirk]

everyone keep track of how often they fart at work today. see who notices.

 

[sexy pornstar]

what do you people do about gas at work? i let 'em rip, but then when people come into my office, i'm sure they notice it's none too fresh. and of late my gas has been so horrendous even i've had to leave my office for stretches of time to let it clear.

should i burn incense? get a can of spray? or should i embrace it, and when people come in and obviously notice it, simply say, "yeah, that came from my ass."

???

:eek: You should live free to fart hard!

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

I've given this thought and I think it's because I drink a shitload of water that I have no bad gas anymore. Like I said I drink like a fish out of water, so to make up for my dry system, I have to drink lots and lots of water. I'd say that might be a remedy. :dunno: It flushes all the toxins out with your pee, I think, seriously.

 

[GabberMan]

Less red meat and less beer will help. More fish and wine to make up for it.

 

[scarrylarry]

Do you drink a lot of carbonated beverages. I've found that I have more gas after drinking them. The other thing, I'd buy a can of Oust, that should help. You could also go out and buy an air purifier. They don't really have a smell so much, but the air is like your in a room with a hundred fish tanks. So that would probably help as well.

 

[D-rock]

I never worked at a type of job where anybody would really care if it happened or not. :dunno:

 

[Ace Boobtoucher]

When I was waiting tables or tending bar I would pick out annoying guests and "crop dust" them. Highly entertaining, especially when an old lady blames her husband.

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

Yuck. Humans are just such dirty creatures, truly, we are a shell.