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They should also shell out at least $10 million in compensation to my friend who lost both his face and arm. But he'll probably just have to settle for a lifetime of pain and anguish instead. And to add insult to injury, he gets to come back from the war for oil, and pay 2 bucks more a gallon...

Johann Splooge, I'm nominating you and poopfacejim for the best screen names on the board! *applauds* :thumbsup: It ***** me every time I see you guys post! LOL

hahaha....good point! I'm still working out the kinks..

I've been thinking about marketing my ass as a weapon. It's lightweight and accurate, making it ideal for close quarter combat. It is gas operated and air cooled. It is highly reliable in the field. My ass could become a favorite of the Delta ***** operatives.

Hey if you need anymore free legal advice, feel free to ask me anything. I'm not a lawyer, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night. :thumbsup:

Yeah I know what you mean, I like my women only kinda ****** too.

Cubs, Sox, Cubs, Sox...wait what was this thread about? I got me the Len Kasper and Hawk impressions down pat. And let me tell ya, that Len Kasper voice is harder to imitate than you think. Too bad I can't do it here. :weeping:

For 12 million dollars...I'd call BNF 'the enemy of fun' before he closes this thread like all the rest of assfakka's stupid threads. :D

I shudder to think how you wiggled all the way in there.

I think America has a good sense of humor, you know. We didn't actually elect him the first time, then when he fucked up royally during his first term, we re-elected him. Yeah!

I'm a gay woman trapped in a man's body.

The one on the left.

I'd let Michael Vick and a bunch of his homies move into my basement, and set up another ******* dog fighting league, and then after a few months I'd invite my ******'s FBI friend to come watch....for 12 million dollars.

Need Another Shuttle Also

Hmm, I think I'll go for the one that looks like it had the least amount of effort put into it.. BNF! Seriously, thats a great pic of her. I like the colors you are using in that one there drdeath! ^ :thumbsup:

After spicy food it's like a combat zone down there. FIRE IN THE HOLE!

Yep, I use them. You get maximum cleanliness. Plus, it feels so smooth and then I go to my happy place. :moon:

Didn't they make a movie about that guy? Hmm, I can't remember the title. I think I tried to watch it once, but when Drew Barrymore popped up on the screen, I flipped it off in a fit of rage.

I'm so desperate for football right now, I'd trade an arm just to see eastern illinois take on the people's republic of bum fuck nowhere. Yeah!! :thumbsup:

Yeeeeaaaaahhhh!!! NFL too! Let's get it on. Enough with this sissy baseball crap. :D

I third that. Congrats Hank Aaron on 755 homeruns! You really are the king, no really.

Hold onto that tear buddy! lol

We'll give them the rest of the old 1945 stockpile.

I clicked maybe yes, maybe no. I'm with the I sure hope there is crowd. Having faith is a good thing, imo.

So she's a malingerer? Is this at work? In any case, just ignore her. You never know how someone is going to react when you confront them. Really I dunno dude, but I clicked option #4. lol I've done that before, but the person wasn't *****. He had his shoes off, and I colored his toenails and...

Yeeaah!!! From the last video game I ever played. (quite awhile ago) Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Lance Vance: It's time for the Lance Vance Dance. Tommy Vercetti: Ok, Mr. Lance Vance Dance.

There once was a man from Nantucket With a pecker so long he could suck it He said with a grin, As he wiped off his chin If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it

"Remember that thing I asked you to do? Remember how you said you wouldn't? Well, your best friend said she would..."

Look, Barry Bonds is a lying, juiced up, racist, adulterer. So yeah, he definitely cheated on baseball. He is arrogantly attacking the most hallow of all baseball records without any remorse or humility, so he can basically flip a giant middle finger to all of America who don't like him. You...

I hear ya, it does all seem the same to me too. But in truth, not anymore my European friend. The conservative jackalopes on this side of the Atlantic ****** a law about year or so ago, called 2257 if I recall correctly, and part of that law makes it ******* for any foreigner to work in any part...

Might I suggest adding some hair and maybe some wavy lines that look like veins 4. If you're going to do something, you might as well do it well. :2 cents:

Having a teacher around would make sense these days. Because besides the ********, the ones that are still running around in diapers, and acting out wildly, could use a timeout every now and then.

"I took a good look at your ******, and well, I don't want to be married to THAT in 20 years."

I don't know, they look pretty even in that display case my girlfriend keeps them in.

I cry a lot...while beating the **** out of who's causing me problems. No, that's not true. The truth is, I like to let people beat the **** out of me while they cry. Hey....! I think I got a nightclub act here!

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Maybe he's talking about Paula Abdul.

Vanessa Blue I can't remember entirely, but I read awhile ago that she went to a reconstructive surgeon (the ones breast cancer survivers turn too to reshape a single breast to look like the other), instead of your run of the mill plastic surgeon. I would guess she must have paid a whole lot more.

Well, on this particular computer I'm using Windows Millennium. Go ahead, point and laugh.

Hmm, they are sending up another teacher on the next shuttle mission? So, I guess she's a substitute.

:1orglaugh Holy water Blankman, no pun intended!

Re: How do you Masturbate? While wearing a toga, and 3-D glasses, I lay on my hand till it goes numb, then I give myself a stranger, while a woman midget I met on the internet, watches on all fours, wearing only a dog collar and a rhinestone covered thong, and while the Hanson's "mmm bop"...

My gf is a cub fan and she wanted to go see a game, so I took her over to Wrigley a few weeks ago. Every time I go in there its always fun, but those just aren't my people, you know. But I'll tell ya, I Haven't been in there in awhile, man, I must have seen 10,000 twenty something scantily...