Nikki Nova

R

RodgerBama

Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

Hope fully we can share some good jokes to help you make it thru your day

When my wife came home Sunday afternoon to find the kitchen and living room a mess, the laundry still in a pile by the washer and me on the couch having done nothing but ***** **** and watch football all day, she yelled, "Watch yourself, mister, or you're going to make me do something I don't want to do."

"Wow," I thought, "I can't believe I'm going to get a blowjob out of this."


"Sir, your ******** says she loves me, and she cant live without me, and she wants to marry me."
"And youre asking my permission to marry her?"
.
.
.

"No, Im asking you to make her leave me the fuck alone."
 
TheVern

TheVern

Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

Ironncially I have been sleepling less but I feel great. Nikki I hope you get your computer working. My comp was really messed up last year. I had to do a complete clean out of the hard drive, and get a whole new system installed. If you have a back up drive , put all of your files there, and do a complete reformat of your hard drive. You may still lose things.

I'm loving the bad Jokes, I will only post two because I'm afraid to use them all up

Why did the Little girl fall of the swing?
She had no arms

What do you call a black guy who flies a plane?

A pilot you fucking racist!!!!!
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

NikkiNova said:
Maybe ...maybe not. I texted her cell at 11:56 pm Florida time hoping it would arrive right at midnight. Not sure if she got it though.
I was up with insomnia last night. I know you can relate. I was up because my Mac laptop seems to have a BAD and nseeky fucking malware on it. As you guys know I am supposed to be leaving town for my birthday and can't without my laptop working. I spent over 6 hours just trying to run scans on it and it kept freezing up half way through each one telling me the virus protection has to shut down. A bunch of other windows have been coming up and the system has been locking up for the past week...yet everytime I run the anti spyware/walware/rootkit **** on it it doesn;t detect anything. Also when I run my antivirus it doesn;t detect anything yet a few windows have popped up seperately telling me it's infected. wtf? I keep updaing the systems everyday and running new scans a few times day and NOTHING! I spoke to a specialist today and he said that happened to one of his partners girlfriend and basically she got it from doing one of the quiz apps on Facebookand it goes SO DEEP into the system that it can't be detected. They were able to fix hers and I have an appointment with them on Monday. I was seriously stressing last night. I spent additional hours trying to save all of my work on my desktop to various disks and literally haven't gotten a wink of ***** and have a 15 hour work day ahead of me. No idea how I'm going to manage! Ugh! Definitely need the jokes today! lol
Nikki Nova
PLZ Vote Nikki Nova!! http://www.missfreeones.com/bio.html?contestant=81
miss free ones and best oscm
Follow me on twitter http://twitter.com/nikki_nova
my site www.nikkinova.com
my blog http://clubnikkinova.com/blog/
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That really sucks! I will never get what people get out of fucking up other people's computers. I guess that's what you get when you combine geeks and too much time! I hope "they" are able to figure out what the problem is & they are able to "clean" your system successfully. I've been lucky, and I've never had a computer become infected.....not to my knowledge anyway.....knock on wood! I've always had a devilish side (though I am mellowing with age), and I used to get a kick out of pulling devilish pranks on people.....but it was SEEING their reaction that gave me my kicks! What the Hell do they get out of pulling **** on people from afar & they never know who they did it to, much less get to see their reaction? I just don't get it!

I can definitely relate to the insomnia.....as I only fared slightly better than you did last night. For some reason, I ***** until 2:30 pm yesterday (which is REALLY unusual for me), but I never got to ***** until 6:30 this morning. Then I woke back up at 8:30 am & have been awake ever since. I REALLY feel sorry for you though, as I do not have a hectic schedule of work that I face today on top of it! It does get old.....but I can take a *** whenever I want most days.

I don't know if it's related or not, but as I have been having recent bouts of insomnia again.....my ***** pressure has begun to rise again.....higher than it should be anyway (and I always take my meds)! I know getting enough ***** is important for the heart....but it's easier said than done. I have a sinking suspicion that my meds will be changed when I get back to the cardiologist on the 26th.

Hope our jokes help cheer you up! Be safe tonight! Happy New Year & an early Happy Birthday!
 
jitna

jitna

Eternally hoping to lick Briana
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

jbs173_1972 said:
That really sucks! I will never get what people get out of fucking up other people's computers. I guess that's what you get when you combine geeks and too much time! I hope "they" are able to figure out what the problem is & they are able to "clean" your system successfully. I've been lucky, and I've never had a computer become infected.....not to my knowledge anyway.....knock on wood! I've always had a devilish side (though I am mellowing with age), and I used to get a kick out of pulling devilish pranks on people.....but it was SEEING their reaction that gave me my kicks! What the Hell do they get out of pulling **** on people from afar & they never know who they did it to, much less get to see their reaction? I just don't get it!
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most of the time its money or information (which usually leads to money). some of them will use your computer to connect to websites without your knowledge and they get money for the amount of times the site is accessed. sometimes its to steal personal information. and of course sometimes people are just assholes who like to case problems for other people. they probably get their jollies seeing how many computers theyve infected and imagining how people are reacting.
 
R

RogueAlan

Guest
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

All right, gang, let me try this...
my favorite work site i'm the only guy in a room with on average five women (of a selection of 8). It provides a simply ENDLESS stream of new information and insight into a mindset i simply don't have the DNA to imagine or understand.

Sometimes that's good... hell, who wouldn't want to work with funny smart attractive people?! But there's got to be some truth to the whole body dysmorphic disorder... We're talking women who turn heads wherever they go, and they simply can't seem to believe that is true. So in talking about the differences between men and women, we found the following site. I hope the graphic comes up, because it made me smile, so maybe y'all will, too.

In any case, thanks for playing with us this year, Nikki, worm or virus or travel or schedule... whatever keeps you off the board we know you'll be back & hope you know we're thinking of you... s'why we check back on this thread.

Best of 2011 to all,

RA

http://www.timeidol.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Difference-men-women-5.jpg
 
R

RogueAlan

Guest
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

and given a topic of the day & joke friday...
found this online:

A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him. “Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.”

“I know” said the man, “but I can’t. My wife refuses to ***** alone.”
 
Rane1071

Rane1071

For the EMPEROR!!
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

Sorry guys no jokes at the moment .. still a bit hungover from last night. :spin: I hope everyone had a good one. Nikki hope the pc probs work out. All the best
 
jitna

jitna

Eternally hoping to lick Briana
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

looks like Nikki partied hard last night. that or her computer is now completely fucked (i hope not). hopefully shell be back tomorrow better rested and less stressed.
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

I won a $10 gift card from Pizza Hut this morning on Facebook, and then I remembered that I am not allowed to eat that kind of stuff anymore! Pizza is one of the WORST things that you can eat (as far as being healthy is concerned.....full of fat, calories, and sodium!)! Great way to start 2011.....next thing I'll end up winning a free gynecological exam....or a free turkey......I swear I've eaten so much turkey recently that I will soon start going gobble gobble! ha ha ha! Now I have $100 for Papa John's, $25 for Pizza Hut, and $5 for Domino's.......GREAT.....NOT!!! Oh well, what ya gonna do??? ha ha ha!

Not to mention the fact that the damned hillbillies almost gave me a heart ****** with their damned firecrackers hours before midnight last night! Then.....when the midnight hour came.....nothing!!! I guess the dumbasses ran out before midnight!!! ha ha ha!
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

jitna said:
looks like Nikki partied hard last night. that or her computer is now completely fucked (i hope not). hopefully shell be back tomorrow better rested and less stressed.
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I read her blog.....she said about her computer & that she was taking it in to be worked on on Monday & it should be fixable!
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

Am I the only person who isn't exactly a big science fiction fan (I like some....hardly all), but just about loves the Twilight Zone (especially the episodes that have a moral and/or make you think!)? The Sci-Fi......oops, they got clever and changed it to SyFy Channel has a New Years marathon & I have managed to catch more than a few episodes. I swear one could teach a philosophy course around episodes of the Twilight Zone!
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

I have a question for everyone....though it is a little late: Do/did any of you eat anything special for good luck on New Years, and if so.....what? Just curious!

I was raised in "Pennsylvania Dutch" Country......which are really people of German heritage (I actually do have German heritage myself on my maternal grandmothers side....doesn't get too much more German than Ritter, which was her maiden name)....so I never really did get the whole "Dutch" thing....as the Dutch are people from the Netherlands.....but they call Native Americans Indians, despite the obvious fact that they are not from India & the explorers knew at some point they didn't go to India either....so what are you going to do....ha ha ha!

But back to the point, I was raised in "Pennsylvania Dutch" country, and the dish they traditionally eat for good luck on New Years is Pork (roasted pork) and Sauerkraut (usually served on a bed of mashed potatoes)! So, that is what I ate this evening for good luck! It's actually quite tasty.....and almost gourmet food compared to what some people eat on New Years for luck.....ha ha ha! Now, some people try to replace the roasted pork with hot dogs......that's just cheating....and pretty damned lousy too! I never do that!
 
larss

larss

I'm watching some specialist videos
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

jbs173_1972 said:
Am I the only person who isn't exactly a big science fiction fan (I like some....hardly all), but just about loves the Twilight Zone (especially the episodes that have a moral and/or make you think!)? The Sci-Fi......oops, they got clever and changed it to SyFy Channel has a New Years marathon & I have managed to catch more than a few episodes. I swear one could teach a philosophy course around episodes of the Twilight Zone!
Click to expand...

Why SyFy? :facepalm:
It's just meaningless. They seem to show more horror than SF these days anyway.
 
magicspore

magicspore

Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

Two gay men decide to have a baby.

They mix their sperm together and have a surrogate ****** artificially inseminated with it.

When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.. A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are ****** and screaming but over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely.

A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the gay fathers, she points out the happy ***** as theirs.

"Isn't it wonderful!" one gay says to the other. 'All these unhappy babies and yet our baby is so happy. This just proves the superiority of gay love!"

The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now, but just watch what happens when I pull the thermometer out of his ass!"
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

larss said:
Why SyFy? :facepalm:
It's just meaningless. They seem to show more horror than SF these days anyway.
Click to expand...

I agree, I never understood the name change. I was being sarcastic when I called the name change "clever." It just seemed rather silly to me. And, about the only time I ever watch it is when they show the old original Twilight Zone.....which as that tends to be in the middle of the night......is quite rare. However, they had a Twilight Zone marathon since Friday (over now), so I was able to watch some episodes of that. I actually like the episodes that actually have a moral or something that can be learned and applied to real life better than any of the others.....and there are plenty of those!

As far as what SyFy shows anymore, I completely agree. Further, it seems like the basic cable channels show the same crap & swap it between their ****** channels. I don't pay attention to what they show on SyFy usually, but it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if they show the same crappy movies that their ****** station USA Network shows......as they show modern crappy horror flicks from time to time too!
 
J

Jon S.

Banned
Re: the Official Nikki Nova thread

akhilpuri said:
Two gay men decide to have a baby.

They mix their sperm together and have a surrogate ****** artificially inseminated with it.

When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.. A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are ****** and screaming but over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely.

A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the gay fathers, she points out the happy ***** as theirs.

"Isn't it wonderful!" one gay says to the other. 'All these unhappy babies and yet our baby is so happy. This just proves the superiority of gay love!"

The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now, but just watch what happens when I pull the thermometer out of his ass!"
Click to expand...


Welcome back to the thread. The whole joke thing is something we call "Bad Joke Friday," after a thing they used to do on a radio station where I used to live. Since it's "Bad Joke Friday," we actually do the jokes on.....get this....Friday.....ha ha ha! Imagine that!

It's all good though......thanks for the contribution.....and try to come up with some more for the next "Bad Joke FRIDAY!!!"
 
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