it's a little long but please take your time to read.
I need some help. SERIOUSLY.
I'm a young male who always liked to be dominated by woman and had a normal and straight sex life always. The thing I liked when fappin to shems is it's like they look like "dominant women" and I loved that fantasy. I've been jerking off to normal porn too since 5th grade and always liked women but nowadays it's hard for me to get very turned on by normal porn. I watch too many ballbusting vids. But still watch normal porn of brazzers, naughtyamerica etc. from time to time but they don't seem to be very attractive to my anymore which is bad. I never liked looking at shemales before this year too. As I've been masturbating everyday at least once it's hard for me to cum and keep my rock-hard-on in a women's genitalia for too long. I always ejaculate by blowjobs or handjobs. But that wasn't a big problem actually people say it's just about masturbating too much am I right? Or what's going on I used to love women and women body since I was a child and I still love it but that thing that I lived got me a little suspicious, what happened now, those are the things I started asking myself after I've been through this:
Few days ago when I was really drunk I just saw a shem at the street and went to her house. I was really drunk and couldn't get hard, she wasn't hard neither. She just wanted me to suck it but I didn't I just kissed and I refused and moved my head. She slightly try to finger my donkey too but I didn't let it for too long too. But right now when I'm thinking I feel disgusted and really f***ed up. Shame and disgusting.
And now when I'm sober the images come to my mind one by one and it makes me feel like puking and when I watch straight porn or femdom porn, I see the dicks and remember the moments.
I was always straight but that experience did put me in a little f***ed up situation. I wouldn't do it when I'm sober but that kissing and fingering thing makes me wanna puke and I hate it. When I was fapping they were dominant females but when it's real it's not really working and it affects my psychology. What should I do? ( btw I was never and still not attracted to straight or normal men in any manners, not even a moment )
What's going on? It looks like too much fetish porn and that fetish of being dominated ruining my life. Am I stop liking girls? Am I turning gay?
Actually I was way more happier and was making others happier too before all that happened. I used to have completely normal sex without losing erection, I used to watch porns without my fetishes in them. But right now I feel like I'm losing interest or getting way too unsensitive(my dick too). Been masturbating once or twice a day or even more for years. I was using a SSRI antidepressant pill too and watching too much fetish porn with straight women. Then this shemale thing came up which destroyed my life. I want to be like ex me again. And this situation makes me remember my failing sexual experiences and gets me even more suspicious.
the problem is, I always liked and adored women body since I was a little kid and straight normal porn was enough for me all the time. I just had a few long term relationships and it was like that at them too.
other then that at casual sex with random women I always f***ed them for a long time then came with their handjobs except some exceptions.
and after I started to watch domination, femdom, ballbusting movies too much I lost my interest to normal straight porn but never lost my interest to women body. Then last year I developed a fantasy with shemales because I see them as "strong women" and I like female domination and I had an experience which I totally did regret and found out it should stay as a fantasy(maybe like scat should stay as a fantasy)
these days my problem is I'm afraid I'm losing my erection during sex and pure sex without fantasies or domination doesn't turn me on like it used to do. or I am afraid of losing my interest to women body. sometimes I think some vaginas are disgusting or I feel like I think that because I'm too suspicious. I was never attracted by a man or body of a man. Not even slightly. I don't watch too much normal straight porn neither.
I feel uncomfortable about all that.
and sometimes I put a gay porn and ask myself do I like it or not. but I don't think I like it. but even if I tend to have a little erection or feel like it doing that I get suspicious again. but guess it had to come naturally right?
I need some help. SERIOUSLY.
I'm a young male who always liked to be dominated by woman and had a normal and straight sex life always. The thing I liked when fappin to shems is it's like they look like "dominant women" and I loved that fantasy. I've been jerking off to normal porn too since 5th grade and always liked women but nowadays it's hard for me to get very turned on by normal porn. I watch too many ballbusting vids. But still watch normal porn of brazzers, naughtyamerica etc. from time to time but they don't seem to be very attractive to my anymore which is bad. I never liked looking at shemales before this year too. As I've been masturbating everyday at least once it's hard for me to cum and keep my rock-hard-on in a women's genitalia for too long. I always ejaculate by blowjobs or handjobs. But that wasn't a big problem actually people say it's just about masturbating too much am I right? Or what's going on I used to love women and women body since I was a child and I still love it but that thing that I lived got me a little suspicious, what happened now, those are the things I started asking myself after I've been through this:
Few days ago when I was really drunk I just saw a shem at the street and went to her house. I was really drunk and couldn't get hard, she wasn't hard neither. She just wanted me to suck it but I didn't I just kissed and I refused and moved my head. She slightly try to finger my donkey too but I didn't let it for too long too. But right now when I'm thinking I feel disgusted and really f***ed up. Shame and disgusting.
And now when I'm sober the images come to my mind one by one and it makes me feel like puking and when I watch straight porn or femdom porn, I see the dicks and remember the moments.
I was always straight but that experience did put me in a little f***ed up situation. I wouldn't do it when I'm sober but that kissing and fingering thing makes me wanna puke and I hate it. When I was fapping they were dominant females but when it's real it's not really working and it affects my psychology. What should I do? ( btw I was never and still not attracted to straight or normal men in any manners, not even a moment )
What's going on? It looks like too much fetish porn and that fetish of being dominated ruining my life. Am I stop liking girls? Am I turning gay?
Actually I was way more happier and was making others happier too before all that happened. I used to have completely normal sex without losing erection, I used to watch porns without my fetishes in them. But right now I feel like I'm losing interest or getting way too unsensitive(my dick too). Been masturbating once or twice a day or even more for years. I was using a SSRI antidepressant pill too and watching too much fetish porn with straight women. Then this shemale thing came up which destroyed my life. I want to be like ex me again. And this situation makes me remember my failing sexual experiences and gets me even more suspicious.
the problem is, I always liked and adored women body since I was a little kid and straight normal porn was enough for me all the time. I just had a few long term relationships and it was like that at them too.
other then that at casual sex with random women I always f***ed them for a long time then came with their handjobs except some exceptions.
and after I started to watch domination, femdom, ballbusting movies too much I lost my interest to normal straight porn but never lost my interest to women body. Then last year I developed a fantasy with shemales because I see them as "strong women" and I like female domination and I had an experience which I totally did regret and found out it should stay as a fantasy(maybe like scat should stay as a fantasy)
these days my problem is I'm afraid I'm losing my erection during sex and pure sex without fantasies or domination doesn't turn me on like it used to do. or I am afraid of losing my interest to women body. sometimes I think some vaginas are disgusting or I feel like I think that because I'm too suspicious. I was never attracted by a man or body of a man. Not even slightly. I don't watch too much normal straight porn neither.
I feel uncomfortable about all that.
and sometimes I put a gay porn and ask myself do I like it or not. but I don't think I like it. but even if I tend to have a little erection or feel like it doing that I get suspicious again. but guess it had to come naturally right?
yeah shit happens but dude I'm serious 
