Obese Ohio Man Found Fused to Chair He Sat in for 2 Years

StanScratch

My Penis Is Dancing!
Fuck you up the ass, Ohio. What's sad is that I read somewhere else this guy is one of Ohio's top fitness instructors.
 
I remember reading about a similar incident a couple years ago. On that occasion it involved a similarly obese woman who had been sat in a chair for a similar amount of time or longer.

I wonder what would happen if we had just left them there a couple years longer, removing the obvious life threatening infections they would inevitably get having to sit in their own waste and the hundreds of bed sores that would accompany them (as well as the damage done to their bodies by the obesity itself). How would these beings; part human, part chair live amongst polite society? Would they be accepted as so many others with some sort of abnormality, or would they suffer the same fate as poor Jeff Goldblum in The Fly and be shunned as social outcasts, forced to live amongst the shadows and only giving comfort to drunken tramps whose feet are a little sore....

The life of a Chairman, or should I say Chairperson, isn't easy.
 

StanScratch

My Penis Is Dancing!
I remember reading about a similar incident a couple years ago. On that occasion it involved a similarly obese woman who had been sat in a chair for a similar amount of time or longer.

I wonder what would happen if we had just left them there a couple years longer, removing the obvious life threatening infections they would inevitably get having to sit in their own waste and the hundreds of bed sores that would accompany them (as well as the damage done to their bodies by the obesity itself). How would these beings; part human, part chair live amongst polite society? Would they be accepted as so many others with some sort of abnormality, or would they suffer the same fate as poor Jeff Goldblum in The Fly and be shunned as social outcasts, forced to live amongst the shadows and only giving comfort to drunken tramps whose feet are a little sore....

The life of a Chairman, or should I say Chairperson, isn't easy.



Am I the only one familiar with the story of Chairface Chippendale? He carved Charo's name on the face, for Pete's sake!
 
"I can't take life anymore! Thats it, Im refusing to get up! Now to just find myself something to fuse to hmm? :dunno: A Knife, A Gun, No wait I got it, Urine & Feces.
They shall call me Maggot Man" :D
 
To be fair StanScratch sells his sperm as a natural substitute for caulk and actually this is what fused the man to the chair. It is also weatherproof once dries.

Way to protect the environment, Stan! Way to go!
 

TheOrangeCat

AFK..being taken to the vet to get neutered.

StanScratch

My Penis Is Dancing!
To be fair StanScratch sells his sperm as a natural substitute for caulk and actually this is what fused the man to the chair. It is also weatherproof once dries.

Way to protect the environment, Stan! Way to go!


Hehehehehehehe. "Caulk".
 

biomech

Virtus Junxit Mors Non Separabit
Holy shit.:eek: How fat is so fat that you sit down one day, and can't get back up.
This story is extremely disturbing.
 
Wow... maybe I'm a cold hearted bastard, but put that guy out of his misery already.... :cool:
 
Top