If it's anal, it's not ****

‘**** Cop’ Survivor Wants to Change Ridiculous Definition of ****

Last year, 26-year-old schoolteacher Lydia Cuomo was ***** at gunpoint by ******* off-duty cop Michael Pena on what was supposed to be her first day teaching second-graders at a Bronx school.

Pena eventually pleaded guilty to two **** charges, but only after an initial trial that bizarrely concluded with a hung jury and a second in which he was convicted of ******* Cuomo to have anal and oral sex, which doesn't count as legitimate **** in the state of New York. Seriously: vaginal penetration is required for a **** conviction.

Now Cuomo is helping spearhead a legislative effort to change state law so rapists that prefer less traditional methods don't get off easy.

"I feel like essentially I had a silver platter of a **** case," she told the New York Daily News. "I had witnesses, I had DNA, I had my own testimony, I had two cops. I had them saying, ‘We admit he sexually assaulted you,' and I didn't get the verdict I needed the first time, and that just highlights to me the problem in the system."

Cuomo will go to Albany tomorrow to support a bill by Assemblywoman Aravella Simotas (D-Queens) that would add ****** oral and anal sex to the state's vaginal **** statute. The bill was introduced last year after Cuomo's case, but went nowhere. "New York lags behind such liberal bastions as South Dakota and Tennessee in how we define ****," Simotas said. (Sarcastically, obviously.) "New York should be at the forefront to protect crime victims."

"The more I talk about it, the more power I take over it," Cuomo said when asked why she's getting political. "**** is about power. For me, it was a loss of power. This is my story. The more I speak out about it, the more I own it. It's mine."
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