Entertain me

[Petra]

My work computer has been hijacked by some nasty malware so I've been reduced to duties such as...getting Roald more soda. ;-\

Entertain me.

 

[Neutron66]

http://www.fun-with-words.com/boggle.html

 

[Alyssa Rose]

I always am entertained by this joke

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.The
very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her.. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfit s. She couldn't decide which
one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes
to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each
outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you..... she was so excited. She must
have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think
she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she
doesn't even know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a
loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual
satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited
anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me
to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you
just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

:dunno:

 

[BlueBalls]

Would you like me to show you my penis?

That's always a sure fire way to make someone laugh. A sympathy laugh it is, but a laugh none the less.

 

[gunslingingbird]

How can you tell if the stage is level? The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.

Did you hear about the bassist who locked his keys in his car? Took him 45 minutes to get the drummer out.

What's the difference between a guitarist and a large pizza? A large pizza can actually feed a family of four.

 

[L3ggy]

 

[LukeEl]

I got this map with a big red X on it, I am debating if said X is written in blood or strawberry jam, let us discuss.

 

[Shifty]

Here you go Petra my dear.

Turn up the volume and enjoy!

 

[busenbust]

entertain? ! get the hell out of here ! or i shall get my friend mr t on to u ! install Mbam and run that -- will keep u entertained for ages Pet. :hybrid:

 

[Roald]

Get me another coke woman!

 

[rock hard]

This site could be some fun
http://oddcast.com/demos/tts/tts_example.php?clients

 

[Member442]

If I was closer I'd come visit. I think I could keep you entertained. Though Roald would need to go get his own coke we would be kinda busy.

 

[Ace Bandage]

Here's why nature is awesome:



Worth the 8 minutes.

 

[Danglyparts]

there's always www.addictinggames.com