Angry With Internet Porn!

[feelfree]

A few times a week I'll watch some porn online right before I go to bed because a good, powerful orgasm helps me get to sleep really fast. But sometimes I have a little trouble executing such a relatively simple task. I have an incredibly slow computer and it takes me an average two to three minutes to access and navigate websites. So that's maybe a minute to get to my homepage and then another two or three minutes to get to my email and then another three minutes to get to my inbox and another three minutes to actually read the selected emails. I can't even watch YouTube on this piece of useless shit.

Tonight was one of those nights. I go to one of my favorite porn search websites and I search for cheerleaders. The internet speed is going slow but it eventually pulls up a page filled with shemale cheerleaders and videos that look like they were shot in the early 90s and videos with women that look way too old to even be NFL cheerleaders. This is where I'm starting to get annoyed. I go through the next ten pages and they're nothing but shemale cheerleaders and bullshit videos from ten years ago and more unattractive women trying to look like high school girls. So it took me around 30 minutes to get through ten pages of that bullshit, I desperately can't get turned on and I've got blue balls bad. I want to rip my fucking hair out.

Then I angrily give up and go to a video website to search again. I find a video with the really sexy Dani Jensen dressed as a cheerleader and I think that I'm finally going to get what I want because she's a fox. The video opens in a new tab and it wont play. So I close it and open it again. It wont play. I close it and open it again. It won't play. I open it again and only one second of the video downloads. I open it again and it takes maybe three minutes to download one minute of the video. That first minute is just the setup. I might as well watch the setup. The audio plays perfectly but the video skips about five frames, it looks like I'm fast forwarding a DVD but I can still hear the conversation. It's been an hour and forty minutes of this bullshit. I feel like someone is deliberately fucking with me. The whole experience makes me feel really pathetic for so many reasons. I can't even fucking pleasure myself. And I'm not a people person so its not like I can just go to a bar at this hour and pick up a chick with little effort.

Any of you ever been pissed off by porn? I'm listening.

 

[ForumModeregulator]

this is actually quite humorous!! Sorry for your suffering, but it just made me laugh.


This is short story gold,

"but it eventually pulls up a page filled with shemale cheerleaders and videos that look like they were shot in the early 90s and videos with women that look way too old to even be NFL cheerleaders. "

"I desperately can't get turned on and I've got blue balls bad. I want to rip my fucking hair out."

"And I'm not a people person so its not like I can just go to a bar at this hour and pick up a chick with little effort."

my best advice is to invest in some sort of toy for men, clean up your computer (virus/spyware for sure), and maybe go buy some porn. Good luck. Hope this helps...

 

[PirateKing]

What kind of internet connection are you using?

 

[Boner69]

you gotta get adsl2!!

 

[feelfree]

this is actually quite humorous!! Sorry for your suffering, but it just made me laugh.


This is short story gold,

"but it eventually pulls up a page filled with shemale cheerleaders and videos that look like they were shot in the early 90s and videos with women that look way too old to even be NFL cheerleaders. "

"I desperately can't get turned on and I've got blue balls bad. I want to rip my fucking hair out."

"And I'm not a people person so its not like I can just go to a bar at this hour and pick up a chick with little effort."

my best advice is to invest in some sort of toy for men, clean up your computer (virus/spyware for sure), and maybe go buy some porn. Good luck. Hope this helps...

I did buy a toy for men a month ago and it didn't work. No matter how large or small your dick is it wont work without a lot of lube. Total waste of money. I just can't win.

 

[Ulysses31]

A few times a week I'll watch some porn online right before I go to bed because a good, powerful orgasm helps me get to sleep really fast. But sometimes I have a little trouble executing such a relatively simple task. I have an incredibly slow computer and it takes me an average two to three minutes to access and navigate websites. So that's maybe a minute to get to my homepage and then another two or three minutes to get to my email and then another three minutes to get to my inbox and another three minutes to actually read the selected emails. I can't even watch YouTube on this piece of useless shit.

Tonight was one of those nights. I go to one of my favorite porn search websites and I search for cheerleaders. The internet speed is going slow but it eventually pulls up a page filled with shemale cheerleaders and videos that look like they were shot in the early 90s and videos with women that look way too old to even be NFL cheerleaders. This is where I'm starting to get annoyed. I go through the next ten pages and they're nothing but shemale cheerleaders and bullshit videos from ten years ago and more unattractive women trying to look like high school girls. So it took me around 30 minutes to get through ten pages of that bullshit, I desperately can't get turned on and I've got blue balls bad. I want to rip my fucking hair out.

Then I angrily give up and go to a video website to search again. I find a video with the really sexy Dani Jensen dressed as a cheerleader and I think that I'm finally going to get what I want because she's a fox. The video opens in a new tab and it wont play. So I close it and open it again. It wont play. I close it and open it again. It won't play. I open it again and only one second of the video downloads. I open it again and it takes maybe three minutes to download one minute of the video. That first minute is just the setup. I might as well watch the setup. The audio plays perfectly but the video skips about five frames, it looks like I'm fast forwarding a DVD but I can still hear the conversation. It's been an hour and forty minutes of this bullshit. I feel like someone is deliberately fucking with me. The whole experience makes me feel really pathetic for so many reasons. I can't even fucking pleasure myself. And I'm not a people person so its not like I can just go to a bar at this hour and pick up a chick with little effort.

Any of you ever been pissed off by porn? I'm listening.

Been there mate and sometimes my net/PC is slow for no reason and navigating pages or downloading small video clips takes ages that it gets quite depressing. Try having as few programmes running as possible or use Firefox rather than Internet Explorer, it seems a bit faster to me :dunno:

 

[SpexyAshleigh]

This is why I'm glad I'm a chick and am not reliant on porn to get my rocks off. I can just use my imagination.

 

[lurkingdirk]

This is why I'm glad I'm a chick and am not reliant on porn to get my rocks off. I can just use my imagination.

What is this....imagination of which you speak?

 

[The Grasshopper]

This is why I'm glad I'm a chick and am not reliant on porn to get my rocks off. I can just use my imagination.

Wow!! :iloveyou: You say the sexiest things...



To the OP, here's another idea, create a thread(s) specifically requesting videos at a decent quality but without the higher memory aimed towards your tastes, I would guess many would appreciate the effort put into these types of threads. :2 cents:

 

[ICanHasLogin]

So you're not really angry with porn but angry with technology?

Time to invest in a better quality computer and high-speed access.

Or without that, stick to print or DVD.

 

[BAYAMONXXX]

Since your PC is fuckin up buy some dvds!

Evil Angel has really good porn
http://www.evilangelvideo.com/new_releases

 

[jod0565]

Yes, tv and dvds, new computer, also, make sure you have no viruses making your comp slow.
I have a lot of dvds collecting dust since I got the net back.
Good luck.

 

[Deepcover]

this is actually quite humorous!! Sorry for your suffering, but it just made me laugh.


This is short story gold,

"but it eventually pulls up a page filled with shemale cheerleaders and videos that look like they were shot in the early 90s and videos with women that look way too old to even be NFL cheerleaders. "

"I desperately can't get turned on and I've got blue balls bad. I want to rip my fucking hair out."

"And I'm not a people person so its not like I can just go to a bar at this hour and pick up a chick with little effort."

my best advice is to invest in some sort of toy for men, clean up your computer (virus/spyware for sure), and maybe go buy some porn. Good luck. Hope this helps...

I'm just curious but how on earth were you able to put a photo up on the board?

 

[Deepcover]

Blue balls is the worst...it's probably worst then fucking hemroids...sorry to hear about your problems though...maybe you have low speed internet. The only problem that disappoints me is when I go to a porn site and I click on the thumb link and the page doesn't exist yet the thumb pic is exist on the porn search page...ridiculous.

 

[ForumModeregulator]

This is why I'm glad I'm a chick and am not reliant on porn to get my rocks off. I can just use my imagination.

Haha...i googled, "do men have imaginations"...

1st result:

Y! Answers. "Do men view pornography because they lack the imagination to create their own fantasy?"

anyways, men are visually stimulated. after all it would not have been created, if we had not had a need for it.

But I have an imagination ya know...its just kind of fuzzy right now.

 

[STDiva]

Get a new computer son. Laptops are like 400 bucks now. Get into it.