One person commented:
Problem solved
Why the conditional tense? She is not the child you would have raised, she is the daughter you raised. That she is a porn star has no bearing on those other qualities.
I apologise for the strong wording but you just have to tell your sister to mind her own business. I can't say I'd be thrilled if any of my children made their livings in the porn industry but how I would choose to handle my childrens' life choices would be "no go" territory with one of my siblings, just as it's none of your business to tell her how to handle her children.
I can't believe how pushy relatives can be. You don't sound like you would disrespect the same boundaries wrt your sister and her family so perhaps what is happening with your sister is part of the dynamic between you....you are more passive and she is very aggressive/opinionated, tells you what to do and judges you. How do you think she would react if you told her how to interact with her family members? The answer to that question may help me and others to understand how it is that your sister feels comfortable criticising your parenting decisions. I think it's quite odd, but evidently you don't. In fact you sound as if you feel guilty that you haven't done exactly as she said.
Problem solved